We promised you a Christmas Quiz and as usual you misunderstood exactly what we meant. As a result some emails were received complaining that it did not appear on Christmas day. Do you really think that we have nothing better to do during the festivities? Although our quiz is arguably incredibly boring, it is fairly unusual for this time of year, as it actually has nothing to do with Christmas or the New Year and has very little to do with fly fishing. We never implied that it ever had anything to do with Christmas, fishing or anything else for that matter so we have to refute the accusations that we lied to you!

After completing our quiz, those of you who still have lots of time on your hands could trawl through the past years "Latest News" and see how many "untruths" can be found. Unlike other waters we always "tell it like it is" and believe that honesty is the best policy especially when referring to members of the angling community, most of whom your Editorial Team appear to loath and despise. So rather than waste your time looking for reporting inaccuracies, why not add up the number of people who will probably feel insulted and abused by having the truth told about them.

Our quiz has no trick questions and some even have a vague connection to things fishy, but to give everyone a chance, many others do not.

As our No.1 contributor, we have felt obliged to repay his diligence by giving Bernard Arthur Charles Meaden, Freeman of the City of London, a head start. However, some cynics say that even the brightest super sleuth needs a Dr Watson so, to save his embarrassment, your editorial team have tried to point him in the right direction on a few of the more tricky questions. After all, with more exciting stories in preparation, we do not want to distract him for too long from hammering away on that old keyboard!

Find the Seasonal Quiz answers can be found by following this link: A Seasonal Quiz

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Most of our ageing male readers will never have ventured anywhere near Facebook. If any of you have ever had the misfortune to watch The Jeremy Kyle Show you will be aware that Facebook is an ideal vehicle for every mindless idiot to hurl insults at other equally inane individuals.

Sadly, a few of our readers that do frequent Facebook are the sort of lowlife who takes great delight in bullying the weak and afflicted. It has always been one of your intrepid reporter’s missions, and that of his entire editorial team, to name and shame any such individual.

So it gives us a great deal of satisfaction to come to the aid of poor old REG KENT.

In response to the announcement that scarecrows were appearing around the reservoir, on our Facebook page, Club member JOHN AUSTIN wrote:

“Instead of fishing and wasting his time fishing, should have given Reg this job let him do something useful!!”

OK, so JA’s ability to construct a sentence is clearly not his strong point. However, we must not run him down during this season of goodwill. After all, baby Jesus was destined to also become a carpenter and I am not sure how good was his command of the English language. However, I am assured by The Reverend Streeter that Joseph ensured that Jesus was trained properly and, unlike JA, did not specialise in the use of MDF, No Nails and plastic strips to hide the rough edges.

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We make no apologies for having mentioned before that the saintly Reg is famed for driving the Tenterden Community bus filled with old ladies, who are actually younger than he is (no exaggeration). We dare not publicly state his actual age or the DVLA could be on to him. We can only suspect that Tenterden Council allow him to continue to career around the countryside in a bus filled with geriatrics, in the hope that he may eventually reduce the excessive burden on their hard pressed resources.

While we are on the subject of Reg, we should give Tackle & Gun in Tenterden High Street some more free publicity by mentioning, yet again, that when Reg has nothing better to do (which is most of the time) he can be found sitting in Tackle & Gun, where he has his own chair (no exaggeration), and consumes gallons of free coffee (much as he does when at the reservoir). That mention ought to be worth a couple of free flies for Reg. However, if we also mention that Tackle & Gun have the largest selection of Barbour clothing in the whole of Kent and East Sussex at genuinely unbeatable prices, he could be looking at three or even four free flies.

Now, perhaps Andy Lush, the exalted proprietor of the Friendly Fisherman in Tunbridge Wells would like to publicise some items that he desperately needs to off-load from his vast selection of fishing tackle.... We are open to offers.

Well, we have to admit that it is a quiet News day!

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AN INSTANT RESPONSE

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Bernie Meaden - Loaded Up and Ready For Anything

Your reporter wishes you well, but having had to single-handedly plant lots of bulbs earlier this year, which hopefully you will all enjoy next spring (if the squirrels have not had them all), I don’t fancy your chances of being inundated with volunteers. Now, there’s a challenge!

Having declined to join the ‘working party’ your reporter would be happy to earmark some of our better quality timber and install wooden edging around the cultivated area to help ensure that it can be easily maintained.

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THE CHRISTMAS QUIZ

Just because most of you fly fishers are currently being forced to participate and even pretend that you are enjoying the seasonal festivities, there must still be the odd moment when you can take a quick peek at our latest news page. On some unspecified day you will be delighted to discover that we will have published a Fly Fishing Christmas Quiz. This is guaranteed to delight, enthral, engross and amuse the entire family.

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Unlike other fishing questions which appear primarily in angling magazine crosswords, there will be no obscure Scottish rivers, little known salmon flies or other equally irrelevant questions that an angler in the South East of England has little hope of knowing.

So it’s time to wish you all A Very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

For those of you who have yet to bother reading Bernie Meaden’s latest missive - Shame On You!

Now go and read it, before continuing any further, or you will not know what we are waffling on about.

Some of Bernie Meaden’s fanatical followers took exception at our editor’s assertion that ‘those in the know’ had a pretty good idea where another example could be found. Given the other example’s close proximity to the reservoir ‘those in the know’ consider that it is almost certainly the twin. Or is it?

Although your intrepid reporter has never bothered to go and ask the landowner to view it, he is reliably informed by those who have that this example is actually only half of one. Another reason for us to speculate as to whether ours is just the other half, rather than the ‘Full Monty’.

All we need is a determined man with a spade. Or shall we let sleeping dogs lie and leave this part of the mystery unsolved. After all, even the super sleuths in the Met do not solve every case.

What on earth are we on about? Well, I did tell you to read Bernie’s bit first! - Meaden's Memories

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A SNEAK PEAK

Slow but steady is the name of the game where boat refurbishment is concerned. Sanding and filling; sanding and filling; sanding and filling. So the next time an angler decides to moan about the price he has to pay to take out a boat............!

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Bernie Meaden had nothing better to do the other day than have a wander around the reservoir taking awful photographs, including some of your unfortunate reporter. His aimless rambling lead him to the far end of the dam where he was confronted with our stone monument, a reminder of days gone by. This set him thinking about its origins and as a result of his initial investigations his latest story began to materialise. So, to read Bernie's latest report just go to the link to "Meaden's Memories" at the bottom of the menu on the left.

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For more years than we care to remember Colin, our local birder, has been sneaking around the reservoir observing the wildlife but primarily the birds. It is always a pleasure to see Colin and find out what he has spotted, as we all share a common interest in the flora and fauna around the reservoir and its welfare.

But I was particularly pleased when he arrived today brandishing, as promised, an envelope containing details of the number of cormorants that he had recorded over the past few years. Without boring everyone with the detail a number of interesting facts emerge.

Colin first recorded the sighting of cormorants at the reservoir as far back as 14 December 1986. Over the past ten years he has conducted 66 formal and detailed bird counts. During this time there were only 13 occasions when no cormorants were sighted and in the most recent 22 surveys there was only one instance when he did not see one. He has carried out ten formal counts this year and has seen cormorants on every occasion. Throughout the year the count has resulted in an average of 7.

The most that he has seen on one of his formal counts was 28 but that was way back in 2005. The most that I have seen in the air all at once was just last month (November 2014) when 24 cormorants took fright as we sailed down towards the end of the West Arm.

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As part of our campaign to deter our feathered foe, the bailiff has fabricated what could only be described as ugly monster scarecrows. However, once positioned in the bushes we have to admit that they look pretty scary.

Hopefully, we will soon be trialling what we describe as “a pop-up man” a form of automated scarecrow. Ideally this needs to be fixed onto a small raft which can be moved about and anchored in different parts of the reservoir. This will not be the first time that rafts have been constructed, as back in the 1930’s, immediately after the reservoir was completed, our founding fathers had rafts built on which they grew plants to encourage the development of insect life in what was then just a muddy hole, albeit a very large one.

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KEEP THE HOME FIRES BURNING

As the main double-section log store gradually fills, up the amount of timber still to be logged is down to a single large pile. The mound of cut wood, still to be sliced into smaller pieces for kindling, is being put undercover to dry out as it unlikely to get dealt with over the Christmas period. However, with one of the four stores still completely empty, there is still plenty of room for more timber to be cut, stored and seasoned for future use.

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We received an email yesterday from our friends at ‘Salmon & Trout Sussex’ advising us that South East Water has a vacancy for a Recreational Ranger at Arlington Reservoir, near Polegate, East Sussex.

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Having only visited and walked around Arlington Reservoir for the first time last February, your intrepid reporter probably did not see it at its best. The slight breeze was whipping up large waves in the direction of the dam and it all looked a little bleak. However, the number of fly fishers who come to Powdermill and say how wonderful it would be to be a bailiff now have an opportunity to fulfil their dream. Don’t all rush at once.

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THE LAST TWO EPISODES

With new stories from Bernie Meaden expected early in the new year your editorial team have decided to publish the last two episodes of his American trip before the holiday distractions reach fever pitch. You will find the link to "Meaden's Memories" at the bottom of the menu on the left.

So far this December we have had just two visitors and six members come to fish. Club member, T. Burn has actually set sail twice this month. Hardly surprising as he is the only one to catch fish. Having caught two rainbows on his first trip, he returned to land another three weighing 5lb 12ozs using a baby doll. Why is he so successful while all others have failed?

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ROBIN REDBREAST

Just to show that Bernie Meaden is not a complete dummy when it comes to taking photos we have pleasure in reproducing his photo of our resident robin searching for insects amid the pile of sawn scrap timber.

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Visitors to the reservoir will see lots of contractor’s men and equipment at the end of the car park below the dam. We understand that Southern Water is having a camera fitted on the tower and the workers are digging a trench from the tower, along the entire length of the dam, to the green shed at the end of the car park where the air pump is housed. The plastic pipe being buried in the trench will contain the video cable. I am pleased to report that the friendly (but camera shy) workers are enjoying the company of our robin who was happily rooting about in the piles of soil looking for the juicy worms on Monday. After all, it makes a change from the less succulent insects that he was finding among the timber.

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So why is a camera needed on the tower. Who knows; but hopefully if it manages to capture images of your intrepid reporter going about his business, they will be more flattering than Bernie’s.

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WORK GOES ON

Work on the site of the second jetty began the other day just to establish the line so that the two are parallel. No further building on either fixed jetty or the refurbishment of the existing floating sections are planned before the new year.

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AN EMAIL FROM BERNIE MEADEN

I have been watching the Hastings Fly Fishers website with great interest during recent weeks so thought I would pop along and see how all the new engineering undertakings were advancing.

On arrival on Thursday 11 December I found several cars in the car park and made my way the club house. As usual the door to the rest room was firmly closed; I could hear muted conversation and knew immediately that John 'The Cake Tester' Thackray must be elsewhere. On forcing my way in and recovering from the blast of hot air that greeted me, I was delighted to see some representatives of the 'last of the summer wine club' in residence, eating cake and roasting themselves by the fire, no change there then. Shortly after my arrival The Cake Tester arrived in company with another stalwart director, Barry 'The Fish Monger' Morgan. Both were adorned in life preservers and Arctic cold water survival kit (well that's what it looked like) apparently they had been up the West arm annoying the Cormorants; good for them.

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Now before I relate my little tale. The work so far in improving the jetty and access to the wheelie boats are a credit to the directors and their band of helpers who have been constructing the jetty. They are working chest deep in freezing cold water just to make things easier for us. A huge thank you, and hats off to you all. I for one very much appreciate the effort.

Now whilst looking at the new jetty the question arose as to whether there should be some sort of formal grand opening or dedication, that took my mind back..........

So, to read Bernie's latest recollection (but only for the brave) just go to the link to "Meaden's Memories" at the bottom of the menu on the left.

Editor's Note:
Bernie sent in a couple of photos that he took of more construction work down on the jetty during Thursday afternoon. The editorial team would respectfully ask Bernie to restrict his photographic endeavours to holiday snaps in future and refrain from photographing members of the editorial team. Never in his sixty odd years has your intrepid reporter ever had such appalling photos taken of him.

The fishing is certainly difficult at present and very few anglers come to fish despite the pleasant sunshine of late. However, Club Member T. Burn made the effort to come and fish from a boat at the weekend and managed to land two nice rainbows. His entry in the returns book contains a single word in the “Fly Used” column and seems to indicate that it was some form of Fritz fly but only he knows as the writing’s not clear. All I do know is that he rarely fails to catch fish as he will use whatever is necessary to succeed. Sadly, it almost certainly was not one of your reporter’s infamous Orange Fritz patterns so despised and detested by the purists but I am sure that it was something equally abhorrent.

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A THING OF BEAUTY

With the first phase of the new jetty now complete our attention has temporarily turned to other important tasks. However, at the end of the new fixed jetty the depth of water does not increase significantly for another ten feet, so we will be considering the practicality of increasing the fixed length. An underwater ground survey was carried out this morning to establish the likely line of a second jetty and the ideal length of its fixed section. The bed is significantly firmer and the slope is less steep than we had to contend with during the construction of the first jetty, so we do not foresee any difficulties if and when we eventually begin work.

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THE CORMORANT MENACE

As part of our campaign to deter the Cormorants from visiting the reservoir we have taken advice from The Angling Trust and Natural England and are implementing a number of suggestions that hopefully will help deter the invading hoards. In general, Club members enjoy the birdlife which abounds on and around the water and we are more than happy to live alongside the herons, grebes and other fish eaters, but the large number of cormorants that appear daily has now become a very serious threat to the fishery.

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Although they can be seen flying in and out, few visitors or members will see the cormorants on the water. This is because they are currently congregating at the very far end of the West Arm, well out of sight. They are quick to fly off when a boat comes even halfway along the arm and long before an observer in the boat can see them on the water. The first indication of their presence is when they take off and are silhouetted against the bright sky. It will be interesting to see if the ‘bunting’ that we strung across the water today upsets them and, if so, for how long. They certainly did not return this afternoon after the initial strand had been suspended above the water to flutter in the breeze. But tomorrow is another day!

Work on the fixed portion of the new jetty project is due to be completed today (Friday). The boys took advantage of the dry weather on Thursday to complete the actual staging and just the handrail remains to be fitted together with a few cosmetics. Unfortunately, the water temperature is less than tropical and the depth being worked in was at the most uncomfortable height for the shorter workers. Talk about brass monkeys!

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CORMORANT CHAOS?

The continued presence of significant numbers of cormorants is a major problem. This seems to apply to most fisheries in our area, but larger expanses of water such as Bewl, Darwell and Powdermill suffer greatly as a result of having more remote areas where the birds can spend time undisturbed. They are with us in varying numbers every day.

We are continuing to extend the number of non-lethal scaring techniques that we use as a combination of a number of different deterrents is the recommended approach rather than just rely on one method. The latest 'fun' method for the 'old boys' to enjoy has been used effectively at other waters of our size. The jolly jape involves the use of bird scaring rockets which are launched (at an angle of about 60 degrees) towards a group of cormorants on the water. The exceptionally loud explosion overhead sets them off into flight, at which point a second rocket is immediately launched into their midst which we are assured will really scare the living daylights out of them (not to mention how it might terrify the 'old boys').

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A box of the giant rockets is being displayed by none other than 'The Fishmonger', who can also be seen modelling the latest thing in 'winter woollies'. Fortunately photos of him, which once seemed to appear every week in our 'Latest News', have been absent recently. His lack of recent angling success is primarily due to the drastic reduction in the number of times that he has fished this season. Hopefully, the next photo of him will not have been taken by your intrepid reporter in the A&E department of the Conquest Hospital.

Wednesday 3rd December 2014   - NEW -

We have pleasure in publishing Chapter 4 in Bernie Meaden's tale of his experiences during his four-week cruise to the US. You will find the link to "Meaden's Memories" at the bottom of the menu on the left.

The old jetty has now been removed and is stacked on the bank awaiting removal of the buoyancy tanks. Seven of the tanks contained water of which four were full. The tanks and structure will be renovated before being floated and attached to the new fixed jetty. Construction of the new jetty began late last week. Boat maintenance continues, as the fleet is gradually put to bed for our short ‘closed’ season.

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Three anglers decided to take advantage of the sunshine and the unseasonably warm weather over the weekend. Two regular visitors arrived to fish from the bank while a Club member opted to take out a boat. The fishing in the main body of water is not proving to be easy, yet no one is bothering to venture down to the far end of the West Arm where all the majority of cormorants have been seen fishing. They are not stupid and know where their best chance of a meal is likely to be lurking. Unfortunately our anglers just go to the usual spots and wonder where all the fish are. Dick Walker always used to advise anglers to go around and examine the water before deciding upon the best places to fish and the tactics to be employed. Not bad advice.

Jonathan Chapman of Hobbs Parker fame is always seeking a bit of extra publicity for his Ashford based firm. They will sell anything from old bangers, crumbling dwellings, mangy animals and anything and everything which they are able to con the innocent punter into bidding for. So it is hardly surprising that regular exotic fly fishing holidays are the norm.

Despite a touch of envy your editorial team have great pleasure in publishing his latest email complete with tempting photos. Thank goodness he isn’t running some dodgy Travel Agency or he would not just be able to empty your pockets, but probably also leave you stranded on some God forsaken location.

Scott Evans continues to nurse the victim of a road accident who is gradually improving and we are keeping our fingers crossed that this beautiful hawk can make a full recovery and be released back into the wild. Scott is photographed with ‘Captain’ Chisholm. (See the video in our Latest News on Monday 17th November).

Visitors to the reservoir may see Scott constructing the new fixed part of the boat jetty which is scheduled to begin at the end of this week. The existing jetty is being removed, dismantled and refurbished. The two sections will be joined by a flexible ramp. In the longer term, we hope to be able to construct a second jetty so that there is plenty more room to manoeuvre the boats. Boat anglers at Powdermill are only too aware of the difficulty in berthing their boat on a crowded jetty.

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CLEAN & TIDY

At this time of year there are always plenty of annual tasks to do at the reservoir, but currently the emphasis is on putting the boats to bed for the winter. All the wooden boat seats have to be removed, sanded, re-varnished and stored away.

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Clearing some of the dead or dying trees from behind the lodge have enabled part of the wooden exterior wall to dry out and the verdigrises’ which covered it has disappeared. Opening up the other end will enable the remainder to improve and could even reduce the slipperiness of the path. Hopefully this will extend the life of the ageing shack which so many people think is quaint. In truth it’s a money pit which needs so much spent on it that I sometimes despair. My daughter-in-law, who insists that it is charming and antiquated recently described it as “being Shabby-chic; but more shabby than shic”.

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WHAT’S ON YOUR CHRISTMAS LIST?

As we hurtle towards December and the countdown to the Christmas festivities, most fly fishermen are too preoccupied to come fishing. Most are planning their assault on the shops to purchase some impressive gift for their nearest and dearest. Sadly, most recipients will be disappointed.

For the past ten years or so your intrepid reporter has insisted on purchasing his own present to avoid the constant disappointment of being confronted with some other family member’s idea of what will delight him. The earlier you buy it the better (preferably as soon after Christmas as possible) so that by the time you get to open it, you have almost forgotten what it is. Never disappointing and just what you wanted!

Although few anglers come to fish at this time of year there is always something going on. It is hardly surprising that there is always plenty that needs to be done before the winter sets in. Unfortunately there is always more to be tackled than we can reasonably manage so the longer the mild weather continues the better.

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Club member Norman Harle and his wife have moved from Staplecross to East Anglia to be nearer their son. Norman is an avid fisherman and will fish for anything wherever he goes whether it be game, coarse or sea. He is always on the lookout for somewhere to fish and is particularly noted for always finding time to fish when on holiday abroad while his long suffering wife takes to the shops. For the past two years he has been the winner of the Darwell Cup (heaviest fish in 2013 and 2014) and this year was the first to take the members season limit of 120 rainbows. We will miss him.

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The headline is true but one could argue that it possibly is a bit misleading. Dull and cloudy but not cold and virtually no wind; the weather is not perfect but given that it is November, it is reasonable. However, Club member John Noble was the only angler to fish at the reservoir this weekend and, although he chose not to take a boat, he managed to land a fish from the dam. Bank anglers have been having a particularly hard time as most fish appear to be out of casting range, but then John is a particularly long caster!

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Don't forget that it's only £20 to fish all day and only an additional £10 for a boat. So, two of you can have a day’s boat fishing for a paltry £25 each. You could even be the only fishermen on the water. Where else can you and a friend hire an entire 55 acre trout fishery, all to yourselves and for so little?

And you could even meet the intrepid reporter, have your photograph taken by him and then have the opportunity of appearing and being insulted in our ‘Latest News’. What a bargain!

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ANOTHER INTERESTING CHARACTER

'Captain' Chisholm, who features regularly in our 'Latest News', has a surprisingly attractive daughter, Linda (who, joking apart, really does take after her mother). Her partner, Scott, is currently involved in a number of HFF activities and projects which have included ‘Suez Canal II’ and ‘The New Road’. In his younger days he used to regularly fly fish at Powdermill and still hankers after casting a line. We will avoid boring you with his innumerable other interests, but suffice it to say that we hope that Porsche enthusiasts will see something very special when your reporter’s planned ‘Fly Fishers Motoring Photo Shoot’ takes place next Spring at Powdermill.

In the meantime, take a look at the video of a ‘hit and run’ victim being tended by Scott. His skills are not limited to our feathered friends as ‘Captain’ Chisholm can confirm. There was the famous case of “Bambi in the Bedroom”, but that’s another story!

On Friday morning, during a brief coffee break, ‘Captain’ Chisholm excitedly instructed your reporter to look out of the window. Having only minutes earlier been bemoaning the fact that he had not seen a kingfisher at the reservoir for many years, your reporter was delighted to be confronted with one sitting on the railings in front of the lodge. Mesmerised by the beautiful colours and not wishing to alarm the bird he dared not go to get his camera and the two just sat and admired the kingfisher until it finally darted away.

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If that was not sufficient ornithological excitement for one day, come the afternoon during another brief coffee break, what should arrive to sit in exactly the same spot but a magnificent Sparrowhawk. This bird was so relaxed and stayed for so long that your reporter finally decided to cross the room to get his camera and take a few shots through the window. This specimen would appear to be a fully grown adult female. Sparrowhawks are regularly seen perching on the fence posts along the dam, but this was your reporter’s closest encounter. This was one occasion when your reporter wished he had brought one of his better cameras rather than just his ‘pocket’ model.

Despite there being no anglers present on Friday, we only observed four cormorants, happily fishing in the main body of the reservoir. However, the majority tend to congregate at the end of the ‘long arm’, where they generally have the area to themselves as hardly any boat anglers have bothered to go down there this season.

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The previous Friday your reporter and had sailed around the reservoir inspecting the banks and had counted no less than 25 cormorants fleeing from this the end of the long arm as he and his companion approached. They were also surprised at the large number of tufted duck feeding in the shallows in the same general area and on the way back were even more delighted to see a dabchick (little grebe) darting in among the overhanging branches.

With few anglers around to disturb the wildlife, the bird life abounds both on the water and in the air. Even the normally shy deer are making regular appearances on the far bank in full view of the lodge.

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BUSY, BUSY, BUSY

Visitors to the reservoir will notice that lots of work seems to be underway. Despite the unsettled weather, we need to take every opportunity to use the quiet winter period to get jobs done. With Powdermill’s beautiful surroundings also having the reputation of offering relative peace and quiet it is important that we try to restrict our noisier activities to when few anglers are present.

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WATER, WATER, EVERYWHERE - SO WHERE ARE ALL THE FISH?

The recent rainfall has meant that the reservoir is back to its full capacity and is actually pouring over the overflow. As a result of all the rain the normally crystal clear water is slightly clouded, but still far from sufficient to cause visibility problems as far as the fishing is concerned.

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However, it would be wrong to suggest that the fishing is anything but hard at present. With the aerator having now been switched off for some weeks, the fish are really well spread throughout the reservoir. Anglers are having to work hard and move about to try and locate fish. With little fly life in evidence the lure anglers appear to have the advantage. Nevertheless, everyone who has succeeded in catching a rainbow agrees that they are fighting particularly hard in the cold water. And, believe me, when your reporter is obliged to don his chest waders to carry out some watery task he is only too aware that winter is almost upon us as he wades into a depth of around 27″. Ernie Wise was not the only one with Short, Fat, Hairy Legs!!!

On Saturday 1st November, Club member Geoffrey Pilcher had managed a limit bag in the glorious sunshine. Sunday and Monday were wet and miserable. After two days with no activity at the reservoir it was a relief to wake up to find that Tuesday, in complete contrast to the previous two days, was sunny and the air was still. The prospects looked very good.

Unfortunately both the BBC and ITV morning programs featured the usual incompetent weather forecasters who had predicted plenty of showers across the South East. Hardly surprising that no visitor arrived to risk a soaking and only two Club members, both Tuesday regulars, arrived to have a go.

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Don Burt and Paul Strivens appeared loath to actually remove themselves from the comfort of the lodge despite the splendid weather. As both are regular fishing ‘failures’, the other inhabitants of the lodge were not in any hurry to encourage them go out, only to blank and put others off from fishing.

Finally Don rowed off, but only as far as the nearest marker buoy where he proceeded to cast in all directions but caught nothing. Later, when your reporter stated that it was time to finally finish sawing the remaining timber, Paul decided to go fishing before he got press-ganged into helping.

Not long after settling in on the dam Paul was seen to be struggling with something that was powering its way around the reservoir while he hung on like grim death. So intent on getting an action photo of this titanic struggle, your intrepid reporter actually broke into a trot along the dam. As Paul had almost played the fish to a standstill before his exhausted photographer arrived, Paul felt obliged to wait before finally bringing it in. However, much to his disappointment and the reporter’s frustration, it soon became apparent that the ‘monster’ that had put up such a good fight was actually a normal sized fish which had been foul-hooked. It appeared to have gone for the dropper, missed, turned and got the point fly hooked in its side. Had it been in the tail it would have probably ‘smashed’ the line and been another ‘monster’ that got away. Paul had seen plenty of fish moving which were out of casting range before this shoal of about a dozen rainbows swam past, just under the surface, but actually within reach.

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Poor old Don came in for lunch having also seen plenty of fish, but they were also out of reach between him and the dam. So it appears that the crafty rainbows have worked out that there is an area between the dam and the marker buoys (inside which the boats are not allowed) where casters cannot reach. They obviously enjoy swimming up and down just to infuriate and frustrate the unfortunate angler.

After a revitalizing lunch back in the lodge, Don decided to try his luck from the dam, given that he could not reach the cruising fish from the boat. After a short while, the observers in the lodge were gobsmacked to see Don’s rod bend. Your reporter, having completed sawing, refused to rush out again on another fools errand. Having only brought his small camera, he commandeered Mick Coleman’s Lumix Bridge Camera with its 600mm zoom lens and proceeded to take photos from inside the lodge through the filthy window. Unfortunately, Mick had fitted a red filter as he had come to try and capture the sunset. With no time to unscrew the filter the images appear weird to say the least. Will they ever get published? Unlikely as Mick has only recently moved into Digital, having been a died-in-the-wool black and white film man and anything associated with transferring images to computers are akin to the voodoo performed by witch doctors.

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No sooner had Don caught his fish than he decided that honour was satisfied and he could also call it a day. Both anglers departed, happy that the weather had been wonderful and, although the fishing had been frustrating, they had had some success and neither would go hungry that evening.

With the charlatans at the Met Office forecasting more rain and misery in the next few days, only the hardy (or do we mean foolhardy) are likely to go fishing. Hopefully, those that do will be a better class of angler!!!!

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PART III OF BERNIE’S ADVENTURE

We have pleasure in publishing another chapter in BM’s recount of his experiences during his four-week cruise to the US. You will find the link to "Meaden's Memories" at the bottom of the menu on the left.

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The original intention today was to dig out the ‘Suez Canal’, but the machinery suppler had let our contractor down, so instead Scott started work on the roadway leading down to the hard standing. The heavy equipment is now arriving next Thursday, so we have a week to worry about the water level, which is gradually creeping up as a result of all the rain and will hamper the excavation.

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THE BIRDERS

Colin, our local birder, arrived this morning with three fellow birders. To really infuriate them, all you need do is refer to them as Twitchers. There is a world of difference between the two and, on this occasion, your intrepid reporter took one look at Colin’s unsavoury looking companions and decided to remain uncharacteristically polite.

It transpired that they were very happy having observed a flock of over 100 Greylag geese over the reservoir. Having seen hundreds (if not thousands) of Greylags feeding off crops on Hayling Island earlier this year, your reporter remained unimpressed, but they assured me that it is very unusual to see them around this area.

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I did not have the heart to inform them that we had spotted a few flying over the reservoir earlier in the week. I believe that the open season for ducks and geese runs from the beginning of September until the end of January. As no one shoots game birds around the reservoir they had better stay put if they know what’s good for them.

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MORE DEER SIGHTINGS

The fallow deer that had appeared on the far bank last Tuesday had been females, but this afternoon a buck appeared sporting a superb set of antlers. With no boat or bank anglers in the vicinity the buck seem very relaxed and happily grazed in the open for at least twenty minutes. However, there was no sign of any accompanying does. Later, as the light began to fade a couple of females also came out of the woods for a short while in exactly the same place.

There were two bucks calling on and off all day. One was south east of the reservoir and the other seemed to be to the west. Although there appear to be less each year, it is reassuring that there are still a few about despite indiscriminate shooting and deer fencing.

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AS DARKNESS FALLS

Only one boat was out this morning, containing that dastardly duo - The ‘Cuckoo’ and his ‘Carer’. One fish was hooked and lost and that was the sum total of their morning’s excitement. A visitor arrived in the afternoon, went out in a boat, but did not stay very long and reported that there was no sign of any fish or any fly life on the water. Despite your reporter’s suggestion that he stay longer and get his money’s worth, he insisted on going home to the bosom of his family, having maintained that he had still enjoyed a pleasant if uneventful couple of hours.

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Later, as darkness fell, a stroll down to the jetty revealed that the reservoir, which had remained inactive all day, was finally coming alive. Initially, a small shoal of Rudd could be seen rising to the left of the jetty, but this soon spread all around. The fish appeared to be taking something off the surface but it was not possible to see anything. Then larger single fish began to make ripples further out and as it got darker the number of rises within the limited view increased. These were almost certainly rainbows. They were all definitely feeding and not just surfacing. If only our visitor heeded your reporter’s advice. But even if he had, he would probably still have left before all this activity began.

If things are not going to happen until this late, we may have to fit lanterns to the boats and a beacon on the jetty to guide them ashore. Or maybe we could erect floodlights. On second thoughts maybe floodlighting is not such a good idea, as our Power Companies are apparently already struggling to meet demand. With the threat of power cuts this winter, such an event while someone is in the middle of the reservoir would not be funny. However, it would provide us with something interesting to report for a change.

Wednesday was awful with rain all day, yet one hardy visitor refused to be deterred. Our friend Richard Thomlinson, who visits us occasionally from his home near Haywards Heath, is not one to be put off by bad weather. This is just as well as this is not the first time that he has turned up when most anglers would remain at home, let alone go out in a boat in the middle of a reservoir. In such awful conditions he really does deserve to catch something but sadly the most likely catch will be a cold.

Having been professionally involved with wood since1987, his company Thomlinson’s Oak Framed Buildings have produced some wonderful constructions. We always enjoy hearing about his recent projects. Despite its title, they do not just deal in oak, as the cost of this material can be prohibitive and not always appropriate. If you ever need a timber expert or a high quality build you could do a lot worse than speak to Richard.

And No! Your reporter had to forgo the plan to finish sawing, but the weather will also delay the next timber delivery so all is not lost.

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A FIRST TIME FOR EVERYTHING

The editorial team prefer to use stills on the website and only rarely include a video in ‘Latest News’. However, there are occasions when only a video will do. Wednesday morning was one such occasion. There are three things of note. One is the very rare sight of a certain person doing some house-keeping, another is the sight of someone stuffing his face despite being on a diet and lastly you can see (or rather cannot see) the man who would rather not be spotted by the authorities. We apologise for the bleeps.

Michael ‘The Wood Butcher’ Wood will be amazed by the spectacle as he is normally expected to perform the weekly ‘sweep’ on a Friday. So why was the broom out today? Your reporter is not sure as no one actually enquired as to why. Could it be that the ash from the fire, which has not been cleaned since first lit earlier in the month, is beginning to spill all over the floor? It’s not actually ‘beginning’ as it’s been doing so for ages. So it’s twice a week from now on? Very unlikely, as there’s a first and a last time for everything. So back to the usual pig-sty next week!

For those of you who wish to know what’s so amusing about the car being washed, please make discrete enquiries of your reporter.

The temperature on and around the reservoir on Tuesday was significantly colder than the day before and anglers were occasionally sneaking back to the lodge to warm up by the roaring fire. However, this was not a day for remaining in the lodge and observing proceedings out on the reservoir from the comfort of the lodge as there were urgent activities to undertake before the rain arrives on Wednesday.

Men from Southern Water were due to arrive to try and locate our water meter. Two men, two vans and two sets of equipment duly arrived and the hunt was on, with the bailiff, Fishmonger and reporter in close attendance. Despite wandering about with a couple of metal detectors and prodding the ground the whereabouts of the elusive meter could not be found. This was indeed a puzzle as the meter reader (not a SW employee) had been regularly “reading” the meter. We, along with the chaps from SW look forward to finding out how readings were taken. X-ray vision could be the answer or maybe he’s a mole.

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No sooner had the water meter hunt been abandoned than the emphasis switched to fish smoking. “Captain” Chisholm was making his usual mess preparing the fillets while the bailiff spent most of his time attempting to relight the burners. The reporter had grudgingly been instructed by the ‘Captain’ to fabricate these new burners out of a couple of the bailiff’s rusty old tobacco tins. They worked after a fashion but either refused to light or turned into a raging inferno. I the uninitiated could view the entire process they would not be so keen to consume the results, but no one has yet to go down with food poisoning.

The reporter’s obsession with creating a mountain of fuel for the wood burner has not abated and sawing continues apace and the mountain continues to grow. The activity continues to disturb the peace of other Club members who have take to scurrying past lest they get roped in. Weather permitting, on Wednesday, the ‘Captain’ and the ‘Fishmonger’ are scheduled to start chopping the pieces into kindling, while the reporter finishes cutting the remaining scrap timber. The bailiffs skills are directed towards stacking the logs; a highly skilled activity, so we are lead to believe, but does not appear to involve a great deal of sweat.

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The extraneous activities distracted from the usual observation of anglers successes and failures. However, we did hear that fish were being caught from both boat and bank. Sadly, we are obliged to report that instead of basking in the glory of his success last Sunday, Paul Strivens foolishly reappeared in the hope that he could repeat his surprising performance. Needless to say, lightening rarely strikes twice in the same place. Another regular failure, Reg Kent, did not disappoint. But, in fairness, he spent most of his time in the lodge scoffing any item of food that he could find. Sponge cake, crumpets dripping in butter and Jaffa cakes all disappeared down his gannet-like throat.

All five boat anglers caught fish on Monday, but the four anglers fishing from the dam in the afternoon struggled because of the wind direction and failed to catch. With the fish seeming to be out of the reach of the bank fishermen at the moment, the use of a boat is a positive advantage. The fish are not deep and most fish are being taken close to the surface or even on a dry fly.

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ANOTHER APOLOGY?

Your intrepid reporter prides himself on being brutally frank but also open and honest. So we must apologise to Paul Strivens for having berated him last week for letting the side down having failed to catch yet again. He was so incensed he reappeared at the weekend and proceeded to catch lots of fish. Rumour has it the he was so embarrassed at his recent pathetic performances that he had actually sneaked along to the Fishmonger in Tesco and purchased a few specimens. Your reporter would like to come to his defence, as we can assure all the sceptics that Paul is too mean to spend good money just to enhance his standing among Club members. After all, given your reporter’s low opinion of the vast majority of members, there is a distinct advantage in just being part of the crowd and keeping a low profile. So, just a flash in the (frying) pan Paul?

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A STEP AHEAD OF THE LATEST POTENTIAL DISASTER

With the onset of winter and the urgent need to build up stocks of timber, the woodcutters are franticly working to ensure that the fires will keep burning for many winters. Unlike UK Power Companies, who are apparently now in danger of causing an energy crisis, the ‘old boys’ in the woods are determined to ensure that they will be self-sufficient if a disaster occurs. Their main concern is the potential loss of power for the kettle. So now they are looking for an old kettle which can go on top of the wood burner. Yes, we know you can buy a new model, but the word ‘buy’ is not one which sits well with their philosophy on life. Anyone know where one is going begging?

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FLOWER POWER

Last Friday, Sue and Martyn Brignall came to remove the geraniums from the ‘flower’ boat. As usual the plants will be nurtured over the winter and returned in the spring. Boats are designed to resist pressure from outside but this old tub is under pressure from the soil inside and is gradually collapsing. Hopefully it will survive another winter.

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Plans to develop the ‘Secret Garden’ are gathering pace. The garden is so secret that even those involved are not only confused as to its whereabouts but are not absolutely sure what it contains.

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THE RUT

The deer rut is well underway around the reservoir and all afternoon on Monday a stag could be heard calling. His grunting sound can be misinterpreted by the uninitiated as coming from a wild boar. During the past week there have been lots of deer sightings and a couple have even emerged from the woods, come down to the reservoir and appear to watch the anglers. In addition to the usual colours there are a number of black deer which are the progeny of a lone but very prolific father.

Hot on the heels of Part 1 comes Bernie’s account of what I suspect was his most emotive and poignant visit of the entire trip. Sadly mere words on the screen do not compare to listening to his moving account. Maybe we should be considering a video. Can we put up with your reporter in the role of Film Director?

OK, we will stay as we are, as better the devil....

You will find the link to "Meaden's Memories" at the bottom of the menu on the left. Please do not miss this one.

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This item could well have been entitled “JUST STICK TO REPORTING THE FACTS”

Your disgraced reporter is now obliged to eat humble pie, having expressed severe doubts on Friday about our lone visitor’s ability to catch any fish on such a day. Yes, the weather was indeed bad, the afternoon rain was indeed constant, and the fresh faced youngster did not look like someone with a great deal of experience despite having caught fish on previous visits.

Your despondent reporter spent Friday evening in a depressed state, worrying as to how the poor chap had fared, certain that yet another eager youngster had almost certainly been put off fly fishing for life. Your reporter’s repose was disturbed by visions of the poor young man reverting to more youthful angling pursuits, returning to his snug and cosy bivy where only the screech of the bite indicator would force him to venture out into whatever the weather had to throw at him. Not being able to contain his anxiety, your reporter made a fleeting visit to the reservoir on Saturday morning, just to confirm his worst fears.

Very well done! And a Dry Daddy on such a day - now that’s real class!

So in future your reporter will try to learn to keep his views to himself, stop distressing anglers unnecessarily, and just stick to reporting the facts.

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MORE ANGRY ANGLERS

Saturday morning proved to be very traumatic as, on arrival at the lodge, your reporter was immediately confronted by a very angry Bob Sanger, who demanded to know why virtually everyone else but himself had been recently mentioned and praised for their successes.

So without further ado, readers please note that BOB SANGER managed to catch two obviously confused and desperate rainbows from the dam on Saturday 18th October.

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For his many fans, I can exclusively announce that he will be making a star appearance at Brick Farm fishery at 7.30am on Sunday 26th October (or was it Monday 27th October), where he will be taking part in some insignificant Club competition. Not HFF but some other fishing club that he is a member. Please do not hesitate to go along to meet him, as he will be only too happy to sign autographs, answer any inane questions and demonstrate his angling expertise while taking part in this competition. We look forward to reporting on his success.

For those of you who may have difficulty recognising Bob when you get there, it gives your editorial team no pleasure in publishing the least offensive photo of him we could find in our archives.

Thursday was dull and cloudy but the lack of rain and wind tempted five Club members to arrive to fish during the morning. Yet again the normally useless collection of old duffers managed to defy your pessimistic reporter’s prediction and began catching fish. Even Terry ‘The Cuckoo’ Beeching succeeded in landing two rainbows. Only one unfortunate soul failed to catch.

Paul Strivens arrived fairly late and left reasonably early, a beaten and broken man, having seen everyone else land fish. Sadly, Paul did not even have a touch as he sat on the dam alongside the successful Arthur Macey, so he could not even claim that you had to be in a boat to succeed. Having started with a bang at the beginning of the season, Paul’s ‘luck’ has gradually faded.

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Rather than keep going on about how miserable he is, your editorial team dug deep into the archives to remind Paul of better and happier days. We are therefore pleased to reproduce this previously unpublished photo from March 2014. There could be an added bonus, as most Club members just look at the pictures and so will assume that Paul has just caught this fish. This may help restore his status amongst his fellow no-hopers and improve his self esteem. So no need to throw himself into the water and end it all yet.

Friday began dry but by mid morning the rain began. Only one angler had dared to come to fish and he was in his early twenties. Your reporter was somewhat alarmed as it is vital that young fly fishers are nurtured and on such a day the prospects were poor. Not wishing to risk a disappointed youngster, the chaps huddling around the fire made sure that he was well aware that his chances of any success were virtually nil. Fortunately he had already been a couple of times this season and had caught fish on both occasions, so he was fairly relaxed about his prospects. Feeling sorry for the foolishness of youth, your reporter directed him to this week’s hotspot. Although the advice he received lacked any conviction, off he happily went, undaunted and un-phased at the prospect of eventually returning fishless. The optimism of youth invariably overrides common sense.

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By the time that your reporter departed, the lone boat could just be seen through the hazy rain, its occupant still flogging away. In most other circumstances, having an entire 56 acre trout water for your exclusive use for a day would be wonderful. However, on such a day as this we can only hope that, unlike Paul Strivens, this youngsters luck stays with him and he manages to go home with the enviable record of never having blanked at Powdermill. We promise to inform you, but on this occasion be prepared for some bad news.

Has the weekend be any better? Hopefully a few anglers will brave the unsettled weather and your reporter can be optimistic once more.

Five Club members took the opportunity to fish in the calmer wind on Wednesday, without being constantly at risk of being impaled by an errant fly. The pleasant weather encouraged three to each take out a boat while the other two stuck to fishing the dam. Steve Stern was fishing from a boat close to the far bank (roughly opposite the hut) and was apparently enjoying some success. At lunchtime I was informed by Derek Coles, who had rowed in for a coffee, that Steve had already caught three. At this point Derek had not netted a rainbow, but had caught a superb perch in beautiful autumn colours. Yes, even the resident coarse fish (perch and rudd) can be especially pretty at this time of year.

Fortunately, your reporter was otherwise occupied for most of the day so was spared from having to sympathise with the two pathetic individuals on the dam who spent most of the morning watching fish rise out of reach of even their longest, wind-assisted casts. At this time of year when one would expect activities to quieten down we seem to be busier than ever doing all the jobs that need to be done before winter sets in. However, judging by the roaring fire and the number of crumpets being toasted and chestnuts being roasted, you would think that winter has already arrived in the lodge. To add to the culinary delights there was a choice of two home baked cakes, courtesy of Mary Chisholm and Steve Stern. Even ‘The Fishmonger’ abandoned his strict diet to have a bit of cake for the second day running. And why not? After all, Powdermill is all about enjoyment. I only wish someone would convince your down-trodden reporter.

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THE WANDERER RETURNS

Yes, Bernie’s back! No sooner had he returned from his latest 4-week P&O cruise than he was out on a smaller expanse of water. Off he rowed on Tuesday, to a different part of the reservoir from where everyone else has been fishing, and succeeded in catching three rainbows but insisted that he should have had his limit, had he not been out of practice. Welcome back Bernie.

To enjoy the first part of his latest adventure go to “Meaden’s Memories”. You will find the link to "Meaden's Memories" at the bottom of the menu on the left. Don’t miss it.

At this time of year it is great to see that every day someone decides to come fishing irrespective of the weather conditions. We work very hard to try to ensure that we can provide the best fishing possible throughout the entire season, not just during the ‘Mayfly’ period for which we are noted.

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So, despite the gale force winds which were battering much of the UK on Tuesday, I was pleased to find that Don Burt had arrived as usual for his weekly fishing expedition. However the bailiff was loath to allow him onto the water in a boat, so Don opted to fish from the dam. One rainbow was all he could manage as he battled with the gusting wind, but at least it did not rain. We were pleased to hear that there were quite a few fish in evidence although because of the hurricane many were just beyond casting distance (his excuse for not catching more).

With the next couple of days expected to be slightly calmer but cloudy, we hope to be able to welcome the odd angler. And I do mean ODD!

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AUTUMN COLOURS

Even if you are not foolish enough to fish, it is well worth making the effort to fight your way through the wind-blown debris on the lanes to reach “the most beautiful water in the south east”. At this time of year the vegetation around the reservoir is beginning to don its autumn colours. As the bailiff and your intrepid reporter wandered along the dam, moving the staging higher up before they floated away on the rising water (the staging, not the bailiff and reporter), they could not resist stopping to gaze in wonder at the stunning beauty that surrounded them.

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NOW FOR MORE SERIOUS MATTERS

With the acceptance of the offer on the last of the four shacks up for sale in Fir Tree Close, developers are now turning their attention to more important issues. Work is about to recommence on the ‘Suez Canal’ project and we also expect to begin major improvement work on the area surrounding the boat jetty. All this effort is intended to benefit those anglers not as mobile as they once were. For regular updates on these exciting activities, just continue to visit this ‘Latest News’ page.

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A TIMELY REMINDER

With the Clocks going back an hour next Sunday it will become darker in the evening. But all is not lost as during NOVEMBER & DECEMBER visiting anglers will be able to take advantage of our £20 four-fish all-day ticket. So from dawn to dusk you can enjoy some wonderful fishing in fabulous surroundings at a bargain price. Plus, if you want to set sail in one of our boats, you can do so for a mere £10 for the entire day. Share one with a friend for only £5 each. And if you get cold and wet, you should be able to dry out in front of the roaring fire, while receiving plenty of tea (or coffee) and sympathy from those more sensible individuals lounging about in the lodge. Our generosity knows no bounds!

Despite the rain on Monday two Club members and a visitor came to fish in the morning and two more visitors arrived in the afternoon. Even more surprisingly, they all caught fish. Tuesday turned out to be dry but slightly colder and generally cloudy and miserable. The barometer in the lodge indicated that the pressure was still falling - not a good omen. Although no visitor deigned to fish, three Club members turned up in the morning. One opted to fish from the dam while the other two went out in individual boats. Another Club member arrived at 2pm to take an afternoon boat. Although conditions would not seem to be ideal, yet again by the time that your reporter departed at around 2.30pm all four anglers had caught fish.

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So despite the continued unsettled weather, anglers are catching fish and missing lots more takes, if their tales of the one that got away are to be believed. Even Don Burt, who has had a difficult season, has succeeded in landing fish on his two recent visits and was the first to wet his net this morning.

The forecasters predict continued dodgy weather for the next couple of days, but I understand that things will then improve with the apparent possibility of temperatures rising to around 20ºC. How this will affect the fishing is anyone’s guess, but it may encourage more visitors to come to enjoy what I hope will be a continuation of the current ‘good fishing’. Winter could well be just around the corner, so for goodness sake take this last opportunity to fish in reasonably pleasant weather and actually catch fish!

As far as Powdermill reservoir is concerned ‘duffers fortnight’ lasts for the whole of March and April when our rod average is invariably at its highest and everyone should be expecting to get a limit bag almost irrespective of the method used. Once the Mayfly hatch begins at Powdermill the fishing becomes really exciting and frenetic, but landing the fish is not so easy and one-in-ten takes is all you can expect to turn into a hooked and landed fish. Not so much a case of ‘Duffers Fortnight’ as 50 days of ‘Heart Attack’ Heaven!

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THE FLYFISHING LIBRARY

Your reporters patient and accommodating spouse over the years has gradually managed to whittle down the number of books on display and your reporter has fought a valiant rear-guard action to retain, let alone continue to extend, his collections on various themes. So it is hardly surprising that the idea of ‘moving out’ and making his small selection of fly fishing books available to his fellow anglers was a logical solution to keeping his dearly beloved happy and easing the pressure on the more important books.

As usual this involves your industrious reporter in more work. So the first bookshelf is up and the pictures on the walls reorganised. Any additional fly fishing publications that anglers would wish to donate to the collection for the benefit of others will be gratefully received.

Even before the shelf was erected, books were being borrowed. Norman Harle arrived this morning specifically to desperately search the index in each likely book, searching for the Clouser Minnow which is apparently a very effective fly for bass as well as trout. Despite your reporter’s scepticism, Norman was delighted to find a description and picture of the fly in one of the books. It turns out to be just another form of streamer fly. Off he went, book in hand. We await his results with our usual level of disinterest.

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CASTING LESSONS

Many prospective fly fishermen come from the ranks of coarse or sea anglers who want to try something different or fancy extending their angling options. Others who have no specific angling background tend to be persuaded to try by existing fly fishermen who do not necessarily have the skills, time or patience to try to show the unfortunate victim how to make a half decent attempt at casting.

Sometimes it is just as well that the fly fishing friend or relative does not attempt to teach the novice. Speaking from bitter experience, your intrepid reporter still cringes when he recalls his benevolent neighbour showing him how to cast in the field behind their houses. While using a Bob Church Reservoir rod (as stiff as a poker and as heavy as a sea rod), the object of the exercise was to obtain the maximum distance by any means. I still own a pair of these rods and look forward one day to getting them out of storage and ruining someone else’s potential technique.

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Derek Coles

Fortunately, we only get a handful of enquiries each year from prospective students. Although our Bailiff is not a qualified instructor, he can sometimes be grudgingly persuaded to attempt to give the odd brief (but free) lesson. However, I am delighted to report that throughout the year I have had the pleasure of watching new Club member, Derek Coles, effortlessly cast a superb line in all conditions. Derek has had the benefit of lots of professional tuition and it shows. He has also had the opportunity to go fly fishing in so many different situations that he has been able to put his training to good practice and successfully hone his skills. I believe that he is also more than capable of explaining and demonstrating what is required and passing this on to a bemused novice.

Would he be willing to provide the occasional brief demo and lesson? Leave it to me to persuade him on your behalf. Just email us at admin@hastingsflyfishers.co.uk.

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BREACH OF PROMISE & ACCOMMODATION

News features on both these items are currently on hold due to legal issues, but further developments are expected within the next forty-eight hours.

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FISHING LAST WEEKEND

When your reporter departed late last Friday afternoon the sun was shining and the couple of boats out on the water had bags over the side. The afternoon had been spent chopping all the timber that was sawn to lengths ready to be made into kindling and we managed to fill yet another one-ton sack. So it’s back to sawing more timber, if weather permits.

Sadly, the weekend has been a bit of a washout and I do not expect to find that there had been much action over the two miserable days. Will next week be any better?

Despite the heavy overnight rain followed by occasional showers during Tuesday, four insane anglers insisted on arriving to fish on Tuesday morning. Dr Stern, back from a few days ‘up north’ in Yorkshire, had the good sense not to take his usual boat and risk pneumonia. On this occasion he fished from the end of the boat jetty where he could make a hasty retreat back to the lodge if things turned nasty. On strolling down to photograph him, not long after he arrived, I was surprised to find that he had already caught a rainbow. Earlier, John Keeling had also landed one, midway along the dam. Our only visitor was fishing on the far bank and therefore I could not say if he had caught anything, but Anton is an experienced angler (and superb fly-tier) and I would not expect him to end fishless.

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The only angler foolish enough to set sail and risk a soaking was Club Member, Don Burt. The previous Tuesday Don had inexplicably managed to catch three rainbows. However, I was reassured to note that he had reverted to his usual pathetic performance and by the time that he rowed in to meet his daughter for lunch he had failed to locate anything. Fishing the water around the ‘bubbles’ where everyone else has been catching fish (including himself the week before), he was somewhat bemused by his current lack of success, despite using identical methods. But then no two days are ever exactly the same and you have to be flexible. Hopefully his luck will have changed in the afternoon and I will be able to confirm that, despite the dodgy weather, everyone caught fish on Tuesday.

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BIJOU RESIDENCE

Recently constructed, a truly stunning, complete "one off" semi-detached home, in a highly prestigious and sought after area, constructed by a highly regarded and sought after local builder. The lack of modern technology combined with original, reclaimed building materials provides much character and charm. A woodland setting in picturesque surroundings with grounds in excess of ¼ acre overlooking the most beautiful water in the South East.

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An early viewing is strongly advised.
Offers in excess of 177,836.90 Albanian Lekë.
Option to lease part of car park for car-wash facility.

I can only apologise to Keith Blundell for doubting his ability to match John Austin, his bitter arch-rival. John could not wait to contact Keith to crow about his success last Friday which is why Keith appeared the following morning determined not only to catch his six fish but also to match his nemesis by doing so by midday. His success just goes to prove that a bit of intense rivalry can bring out the best in our otherwise lethargic Club members. The fish fell to a Buzzer and a Hopper, both predominantly black.

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Visitors have also been having a modicum of success. The Browns (who I believe are father and son) each had their four fish limit while boat fishing using a black buzzer and Cats Whisker. Another visitor, Mr N. Hook, a local butcher, managed three while bank fishing from the dam. Regular visitor Henry Smith, who lives just down the road in Sedlescombe, caught two from the far end of the dam. Henry was accompanied by his friend who was enjoying his first visit since undergoing major heart surgery. It’s good to see him back in action. Your reporter was pleased to photograph the happy duo. Henry is the one in the ridiculous hat.

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I am normally very happy to mention our regular visitors and friends from France, but they let me down on this occasion, as on Saturday Messieurs Vasseur and Dewez only managed one each.

The only fish to fall to a dry fly last weekend was caught on Sunday by Club member Phil Streeter. I am always scandalised to find that the Reverend Streeter has been out fishing on a Sunday. However, Phil is not one to conform to the common perception of you average ‘Man of God’, but is still the nearest thing to a ‘Saintly Man’ that the Club can muster. Bless him!

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AND THEN THERE WAS MONDAY

What a change in the weather. Rain, drizzle and more rain. Not a single angler was prepared to brave the miserable conditions on Monday. Given the forecast for an unsettled week ahead, I do not expect many Club members to brave the elements, let alone day ticket visitors. So, roaring log fires and crumpets will be the order of the day for the ‘old boys’. However, all is not lost as there are a few inside jobs awaiting such a week as this.

Nevertheless, given that the good fishing continues, any improvement in the weather should be seized upon before autumn turns to winter and fly fishing is left to the hardy few. As fishing continues until the end of December, we can only hope that there are also plenty of fine winter days for the ‘normal’ angler to enjoy.

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A HAPPY ANNOUNCEMENT

It is with great pleasure that we are able to announce the engagement of Fiona Smith and Lee Partridge (eldest son of our bailiff). It is not normally the practice of your reporter to say pleasant things about anyone associated with Hastings Fly Fishers, but there are occasions when it is difficult to find something derogatory or cynical to say.

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Over the years Lee has always been willing to lend a helping hand and is the ‘muscle’ behind most of our activities which call for brute force and ignorance. Your intrepid reporter, the bailiff and even other Club members have no problem providing the ignorance, but ‘brute force’ is in short supply.

Despite Lee’s few good points, your reporter really cannot understand what Fiona sees in a shaven-headed hulk who spends most of his day tending to brainless pheasants and then goes out all night hunting elusive game. Although it’s traditional to run down the boy and extol the virtues of the girl, in this instance Fiona really is the best thing that has happened to him. But I am told that love is blind and Fiona does occasionally have to wear glasses.

Before our lethargic and lazy editorial team had got around to publishing the report of John Austin’s performance last Friday, the jungle drums had been working overtime. So, on making a flying visit to the reservoir on Saturday morning, your reporter was hardly surprised to find John Austin’s regular boat partner and arch rival, Keith Blundell, out in a boat in the same area on the ‘bubbles’, obviously determined not to be outdone. The bailiff confirmed that Keith had already caught a fish. In the hour or so before your reporter left, he saw Keith land another two.

Will he tempt another three? Not if a couple of visitors have anything to do with it as, on seeing Keith playing fish number three, they could be seen franticly up-anchor, rush over and moor as close as decency allowed, but on the other side of the line of bubbles. They promptly hooked and landed one which Keith will no doubt claim should have been his. That’s OK because Keith now has a ready-made excuse if he fails to match Austin’s haul.

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DR. LIVINGSTONE, I PRESUME?

With the reservoir at what is almost certainly its lowest for this year, now is our last opportunity to create the channel through the reeds, onto the recently excavated concrete area in front of the lodge. Your intrepid reporter, in the spirit of Stanley (shades of Stan Laurel rather than that of Henry Morton Stanley) donned his chest waders and slashed his way through the last of the reeds to emerge in the open at the edge of the Potamogeton natans (broad leaved pondweed).

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He then disappeared from view behind the reeds much to the consternation of the bailiff who was not sure if he had drowned and was genuinely relieved when his hero emerged, still slashing away with the lethal scythe in the style of the Grim reaper. Now comes the hard bit - excavating the channel.

John Austin is no slouch when it comes to catching fish, irrespective of if its sea, coarse or fly fishing for trout. As the man most likely to finally end the failure of any Club member to catch his limit, I was pleased to see him out in a boat when I arrived on Friday morning. However, the first angler to land a fish was yet another visitor. By mid-morning I had seen every boat angler net fish but the four anglers on the dam remained fishless despite some abortive ‘takes’.

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While wandering along the dam commiserating with the unfortunate anglers I was obliged to come to the assistance of poor old Reg Kent who was struggling to attach a Daddy to one of those nasty little metal clips which are supposed to make it easy to change flies. I too struggled to get the eye of the hook onto the clip which was unnecessarily tight and was relieved to finally manage it without damaging the delicate legs of the imitation Daddy.

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Further along, I stopped to chat to Arthur Macey, who was pictured earlier in the week ‘not catching fish’ on the dam and was well on the way to repeating his previous pathetic performance. He informed me that John Austin had caught at least three fish. By the time that I was ready to leave, at about 2pm, John had rowed in with six rainbows weighing just under 11lbs. Hopefully other boat anglers will have followed suit but as for the sad group of anglers along the dam I hold out little hope of any success. Will I be proved wrong when I next look at the returns ledger? Probably not!

A glance at the entries for Sunday in the returns book proved, yet again, that it takes visiting anglers to show the Club members how to catch fish. I can remember a time, not so many seasons ago, when it was inconceivable for the monthly rod average for Club members to be lower than that of our day ticket visitors. I can even remember Doug Rigby at a Club AGM asking why it was that visitors failed to match the success of our members. Well, not any longer!

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There are always plenty of excuses. The one I tend to trot out in order to save my fellow members embarrassment is that members can now fish as often as they like, so they can just pop along for an hour or two, just catch a couple and go off, fully refreshed, while the day ticket boys have to stay all day and catch as many as they can before going home exhausted. Did I suggest that Club members could “catch a couple”? If only!

Today’s photo shows an action shot of Arthur Macey - not catching a couple on Monday.

A steady trickle of visitors each day combined with the usual Club members has meant that the reservoir has had an air of activity not normally associated with this time of year. With the current pleasant weather conditions forecast to continue into October, we can hopefully look forward to more anglers coming to enjoy some good fishing before the cold weather sets in.

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Despite the large number of fish present, I would not wish to suggest that the fishing is easy. However most anglers are catching fish but do not expect to get your limit, and you certainly won’t unless you are prepared to really work for it. Most anglers are happy to have a reasonable number of ‘takes’ to maintain their interest and are pleased to take home one or two fish. At this time of year the number of ‘takes’ which translate into fish on the bank is unusually low. No doubt someone can explain why?

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THE LABOURS OF HERCULES

Having published some pictures of shack number four at the start of construction, we are pleased to show you the finished ‘building’. Having now constructed more than sufficient dry storage for our wood, we can now resume the felling and logging of the dead and dying trees as well as the chopping of scrap timber to make into kindling. Anyone wishing to dispose of their scrap timber is more than welcome to add it to the pile awaiting our attention.

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The students of Greek mythology amongst you will know that Hercules had to perform twelve Labours, but fortunately he had the help of Hermes and Athena, sympathetic deities who showed up when he really needed help. Sadly, fables rarely mirror reality and the only help received by your intrepid reporter from fellow Club members during the protracted construction of the shanty town was the occasional nosey parker or know-all who was only too happy to make some inane comment or give the usual unwanted advice.

Although there are very few Daddy longlegs (Crane flies) in evidence around the reservoir, the trout are still willing to take an offering. However, patience is the key when using one. For the less patient, a small green buzzer seems to be a good option.

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Wednesday was not an easy day but Geoffrey Piltcher proved that dogged determination can pay off. He took a boat onto the bubbles and fished for most of the day in the same spot and his perseverance was eventually rewarded with 5 fish. Earlier Geoffrey was photographed in the car park assembling rod number one. He normally sets up three rods but on this occasion for some inexplicable reason he took only two. The other unusual occurrence was to find him wearing long trousers rather than the usual shorts. A sure sign that winter is just around the corner which may not be a good omen, but it was a pleasant change not to find him displaying his less than attractive legs.

Thursday was equally difficult but everyone caught one or two fish apart from Paul Strivens who despite an excellent start during the very early part of the season, has subsequently reverted to his usual lack-lustre performance. Fortunately Paul manages to remain upbeat and can be relied upon to be one of the ‘jollier’ members who can occasionally be found chatting in the lodge.

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FAR FROM THEE MADDING CROWD

Friday is expected to be a bit of a disaster as a number of regular ‘failures’ are threatening to make an appearance. One such angler is none other than “The Wood Butcher”. Sadly, your intrepid reporter will subsequently be forced to listen to a whole series of pathetic excuses to justify their incompetence. However, he has learned that people tend to avoid coming near him while he is working, just in case they are roped in to assist. So in order to avoid having to feign sympathy for the ‘old boys’ current failures, he can currently be spotted in the trees behind the lodge, constructing yet another ‘shack’ in what is rapidly becoming a bit of a shanty town. However, there is no truth in the rumour that he plans to let them out to illegal immigrants, although a car-wash service in the car park would be a welcome facility. As shack number 4 nears completion, it is hoped that this will be the last for the time being.

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People phone, email or even turn up in person to ask how it’s fishing. At the beginning of last week a chap actually drove the 30 miles from his home to the reservoir and, because your reporter could not assure him that he would catch fish, he decided not to ‘risk’ his £30 and departed. The weather was wonderful, the reservoir was a picture and fish were being caught from both bank and boat, but not everyone had succeeded in landing fish so it was not possible to guarantee his success.

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Today (Monday) was such a day, when it turned out that limits could not be guaranteed. Everyone claimed to have had takes but lots of fish were not hooked and two of the frustrated and bemused anglers returned empty handed. No one managed a six fish limit and the best was four fish. Everyone could see loads of fish and at one point there were about fifty swifts franticly taking small black flying creatures from a small area on the water, in a spectacular display. Then equally suddenly, the birds were gone.

One visitor resorted to using a Cat’s Whisker, stripped at speed, to take his two fish. The bailiff was not impressed, but if that’s what it takes, why not?!

Another angler decided to try a Daddy longlegs although none were in evidence. He immediately had fish taking his offering. In a very short space of time he had four fish take this fly but only felt one and eventually caught nothing. So who was this unfortunate angler? Oh no! It’s Mick ‘The Wood Butcher’ Wood again, making a complete farce out of yet another potentially good opportunity.

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BERNIE’S LATEST RECOLLECTION

Bernie Meaden and his wife are off on yet another luxurious P&O cruise. On this occasion it’s a four week cruise to the USA and Canada. I think that this is their twentieth P&O cruise and as usual they are sailing from Southampton. Although Bernie is a retired Metropolitan Police Officer, your intrepid reporter will not tolerate anyone mentioning bribery or corruption in conjunction his eye-wateringly expensive sea voyages.

Hopefully we can look forward to some interesting anecdotes when he returns. However, I recently received something to keep us going while he is away. On this occasion he takes us right back to the beginning of his angling adventures. You will find the link to "Meaden's Memories" at the bottom of the menu on the left. Don’t miss it.

Every angler who fished yesterday (Thursday) caught fish.........Oh, except for Mick ‘The Wood Butcher’ Wood.

On this occasion the Bailiff was quick to come to his defence by explaining that he arrived very late in the evening after all the ‘activity and action’ had subsided. The well known angling writer, Brian Harris, and his two companions were apparently packing up by the time that Woodie arrived. The three visitors had gone onto the dam at 2pm for the start of the evening session and the two men both had their four fish limit while their young lady companion had two fish.

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It just so happens that the latest delivery of stockies had arrived at midday and there is a theory among some Club members that newly introduced fish upset the existing fish and the fishing goes ‘off’ for a day or so. However, there is another theory that stockies are used to their last feed at the fish farm at around 5pm, and at this time of day they will be looking for food but will not expect anything later. Sometimes the fishing reflects these theories and at other times it doesn’t! So, who knows? However, Woodie is insisting on using the latter theory as his excuse and he’s desperately sticking to it.

The sad truth is that, after the usual horrendous expedition with ‘Captain’ Chisholm in the wheelie boat last Tuesday, he decided to sneak along under the cover of darkness to enjoy some time fishing on his own for a change. So while the more intellectual amongst us were at home in front of the TV correctly answering all the questions posed on “Eggheads” (BBC2 at 6.30pm) he was franticly thrashing the water in the belief that it was only the ‘Captain’ that has been holding him back. Unfortunately for him his nil return was immediately spotted by your eagle-eyed reporter, when glancing at the returns book, the following morning. So now everyone knows that not only are his efforts down to his incompetence alone but that he has also ruined what should have been another great day’s fishing report.

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To make matters worse he actually admitted to losing a fish because the hook could not have been tied on properly. For goodness sake! Sometimes I despair and wonder why we bother.

Your reporter’s next visit to the reservoir will not be until Tuesday and he genuinely believes that during his absence the vast majority of anglers will have continued to enjoy excellent fishing. Hopefully, ‘The Wood Butcher’ and ‘The Captain’ will be taking a break.

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LOOK-ALIKES

Did you know that the Bailiff is one of twins? And when it comes to fishing expertise, the Bailiff’s twin sister can show many so-called expert anglers how it should be done. Newly retired, she can now enjoy more time with her equally highly skilled angling husband, fishing their favourite waters around the country. ‘The Wood Butcher’ was recently overheard suggesting that it would be great if the Bailiff followed her example. Given that the Bailiff has just tried to excuse Woodie’s latest pathetic performance, some might suggest a level of ingratitude.

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The Twins

Your intrepid reporter’s return to Powdermill has coincided with a very significant improvement in catches - with virtually everyone landing fish, even some of the most incompetent amongst you. This entire week has been a delight especially for your reporter as he has not had to commiserate with disillusioned anglers returning from a fishless expedition looking for someone to reassure them that it is not their fault when it invariably is!

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Thursday's Delivery

To be even more optimistic and make life even easier for you all, I have yet more good news. This very afternoon, we have had another fish delivery. Now, I know that we keep going on about the number of fish being caught in relation to the number stocked, but yet again more have gone in than have come out since the previous stocking.

So, with such pleasant weather and potentially excellent fishing prospects, why are so few visitors making the effort to come for a day’s or evening’s fishing? I could hazard a guess, but how many people dare I offend at any one time!

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GRAVE DIGGING?

Despite the ageing membership of the Hastings Flyfishers Club and the popularity of our beauty spot, we currently have no plans to start selling burial plots around the reservoir. This is just as well as the legality of doing so may be questionable. The rumours began when anglers were recently confronted with a series of grave shaped excavations adjacent to the path leading to the boat jetty. Hopefully, next spring will reveal the fruits of our labour.

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Grave Digging

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WALL TO WALL SUNSHINE

It was so sunny and warm this week that even our resident lizards could not resist leaving the security of their rocky homes along the dam and venturing further afield to make the most of the unseasonal weather. Your reporter snapped this fellow climbing up the lodge wall in order to gobble up the unfortunate insects that were also there to enjoy the warmth of the early afternoon sunshine.

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The Mowing Continues / A Resident Lizard

The warm weather has also stimulated the grass into more growth. At a time when we would normally be putting the mowing equipment away for another year, we find that we are having to continue mowing and strimming. ‘Woodie’ is particularly alarmed as, being responsible for hand-mowing the Golf Course, it looks as if his work is not over despite having announced some time ago that he had finished for this season.

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TWO MEMBERS REACH THEIR SEASON LIMIT

Norman Harle just pipped Martyn Brignall this week as they both reached the 120 fish allowed for members to kill in a season. Norman was particularly peeved as his very last fish was the smallest that he had caught all season. I find it hard to sympathise.

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Your intrepid reporter returns from his travels to find that anglers are no longer struggling to catch the odd fish but are now actually able to catch their limit. The number of sixes and four fish evening limit catches that have been recorded in the past couple of days reflects the continued high stocking combined with the gradual drop in water temperature. So, for the less hardy amongst you, the remainder of September should be an ideal time to come fishing before the really cold weather.

Your reporter arrived at the lodge just in time to witness the return of the Powdermill Trophy to Mick Wood, after it had been engraved with his name as the 2014 winner of our prestigious annual competition. Being an Arsenal supporter he could see the funny side of the blue ribbons!

First thing this morning (Friday) I replied to an email from a prospective visitor advising him to wait a couple more weeks before undertaking the 200 mile round trip to the reservoir. Not unreasonably, he does not want to undertake such a journey if the fishing is poor. I believe that it is not easy at present, but that by the middle of September even our most incompetent Club members should be able to catch fish once more. So imagine my surprise on arrival at the reservoir to be told that Bernie Meaden had set off in a boat the previous afternoon and managed to actually land five fish and lost a number of others. So, as the bailiff maintains, the fish are there and can be caught.

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In September the weather will be cooler and the water temperature will continue to fall. So by mid-September conditions should be ideal and, as we are continuing to stock, the fishing could be as good as it generally is during the early part of the season. As we are open until the end of December (we are only closed during January and February) there could be some excellent autumn and winter fishing to be had.

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EARLY AFTERNOON/EVENING STARTS

From 1st September, we revert to the earlier Evening starts for visitors. So instead of a 4pm start Visitors can begin fishing at 2pm until dark on the £20, 4-fish evening ticket. A Visitor’s evening boat (from 2pm) costs £10 so If you are lucky enough to have a fishing companion, the two of you can have an afternoon and evenings boat fishing for a mere £25 each. Now that’s what I call good value.

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WHERE TO THIS TIME?

No more news from your reporter for a couple of weeks as your resident gossip monger is taking a well earned break, but promises to return with exciting tales of his adventures together with his usual honest opinion of the pathetic and incompetent performance of members and visitors who deign to fish our beautiful water. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to return to find everyone catching fish, but then your reporter would have to revise his justifiably low opinion of you all.

Website Administrator (or if you prefer Content Strategist)
If you have any tales to tell from the reservoir or any articles, views, opinions or photos you would like to share, then get in quick before your reporter gets back. Send anything you can to admin@hastingsflyfishers.co.uk and we will see what we can do. The lunatics are taking over the asylum!

With the heaviest downpours at the reservoir so far, Tuesday was horrendous. During a very brief break in the clouds, Don Burt insisted in going out. The bailiff bailed out Don’s boat for the second time that day and off Don went with the bailiff and reporter watching in disbelief. It was not long before the rain began again. Initially just a few drops but at this point your intrepid (but not stupid) reporter beat a hasty retreat back to the warmth and safety of the lodge. Almost immediately the heavens opened again leaving Don alone and presumably wet and miserable. Hopefully the fire would still be alight on his return; fishless! How do we know that he will be fishless? Well, why change the habits of a lifetime!

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WEDNESDAY - LULL BEFORE ANOTHER STORM?

The forecasters predicted a relatively pleasant day, free from rain. They were right, but no one believed them as only one angler elected to fish. Club member, Derek Coles, set sail mid-morning. Although he is able to cast a very long and straight line, thanks to some professional tuition, this is not necessarily a big advantage when fishing from a boat. So will he succeed in tempting some foolhardy fish to take his fly? Only time will tell.

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The first boat was moved onto the hard-standing today. This vessel was our recent second-hand acquisition which will now have to wait until next season before being launched onto the reservoir. With the reduced demand for boats during the remainder of the season, more will find their way onto the hard-standing where it will be easier to carry out annual maintenance. The reduced number of boats on the jetty will also make it easier for our decrepit and incompetent boaters to manoeuvre in and out.

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THURSDAY ONWARDS - NIRVANA?

According to the weather page on our website, the next few days are going to be perfect bliss. No rain and by Sunday you will all be basking in glorious wall-to-wall sunshine. Most of us wily oldies know full well that the weather during the first two weeks of September can be exceptionally good. That may account for the impending lack of ‘Latest News’ during this period as your intrepid reporter takes to the road for more exciting adventures.

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However, life goes on in his absence and even more fish will be arriving early next week to further boost the stocks of trout that steadfastly refuse to be caught in any numbers. Ok, so Ron Dove somehow managed to land five the other evening, but he was as confused by this as the rest of us.

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if, on your reporter’s return, he was regaled with a Returns Book filled with ‘success’. Sadly if we have to rely on our incompetent Club members, this is a forlorn hope. Maybe the odd visiting angler with some semblance of ability will grace us with their presence and show the ‘old boys’ how it’s done. Fat Chance!

Bank Holiday Monday began with light rain at dawn, got heavier and heavier as the day progressed, and never let-up. On such a miserable day, with such a gloomy weather forecast, you would not expect anyone in their right mind to go fishing. The A21 road between Hasting and Sedlescombe was deserted, as the hoped for Bank Holiday crowds that create jams the length of the “Snail Trail” into Hastings stayed at home.

Imagine your reporter’s surprise, on arriving at the reservoir, to find a van in the car park. Had Southern Water hired expert ‘killers’ to eradicate the so-called rabbit menace? Wrong (as usual). It transpired that the driver of the vehicle had actually gone fishing.

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As the Bailiff, Woody and your reporter sat around the blazing wood burner, they fretted about the wellbeing of the lone angler who could not be seen from the comfort of the lodge. Eventually, at around 2pm, he came into view when he finally moved along the dam. Woody departed, reassured that the lone visitor had not drowned. By 2.30pm the miserable wretch could be seen packing up his gear. The bailiff therefore decided that it was time to go home for his siesta.

Ignoring the awful weather, off galloped your intrepid reporter, to get one quick photo of this poor soul trudging back along the dam. This was to be the only ‘action shot’ opportunity of the day.

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It transpires that Bob Gooden is a relatively normal and sane, if somewhat misguided, angler who under normal circumstances would not venture out in such conditions. However, having been starved of good fishing at his usual haunts of Arlington and Bewl, he has had to resort to visiting Powdermill - on one of the worst days of the season! So, now he’s had a hat trick of disappointing venues! After a long chat about killing ‘nasties’ in Central London, Bob and your reporter went their separate ways, down the deserted lanes.

The evening rises are still proving to be the most productive time but as conditions change, fishing during the day can prove equally successful. However, the first sentence of Steve Stern’s latest text says it all :-

The lack of news this week is due to my absence. Arriving for the first time this week, late on Friday morning, I was surprised to see four boats out with one bank angler about to tackle-up. With the cooler and cloudier conditions it will be interesting to see how they all fare and will be a good indication of how it is likely to fish this weekend.

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Since the Club celebrated its 75th Anniversary in 2007, we have continued to hold an annual Club Competition and BBQ. So last Friday we held our eighth annual event. The twenty ageing Club members foolish enough to take part this year had a reasonably pleasant morning and relaxing early afternoon. However on this particular day the forecast downpour arrived an hour earlier than predicted and ensured that all the contestants got a thorough soaking. Some chickened out and hurried in as the heavens opened, but still got very wet. Other idiots insisted on continuing, in the forlorn hope of catching another fish, or in a number of cases, their first fish.

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Did we say “a number of cases”? In the end, the twenty anglers caught a total of ten fish and seven of these fish were caught by just three anglers. The mathematicians amongst you will quickly realise that the vast majority of decrepit and incompetent members have upheld the abysmal standard that your reporter expects of them and confidently predicted in Thursday’s ‘Latest News’.

Nobody was even sufficiently lucky enough to land one of the recently stocked 2½lb rainbows, but ‘Uncle’ Ted Stevenson did manage to hook one. He was able to see that it was well over 2lb when it leapt out of the water right in front of him, before surging away and subsequently discarding the hook.

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So who were the eventual prize winners?

Since the competition was introduced as part of the 75th Anniversary celebrations, every year it has been won by a different bemused angler whose pathetic performance just happened to be not as awful as the other contestants. This year proved to be no different. However, even the bookmakers were gob smacked by the news of the eventual winner.

The bailiff’s 50-1 outsider proceeded to behave true to form during his boat session in the morning, flogging the water but not having a single ‘knock’. However, having taken note of the bailiff’s recent “two casts - two fish” location on the dam, he sneakily slipped into this potential ‘Hot Spot’. Sure enough, three fish later, it was none other than Mick ‘The Wood Butcher’ Wood who found himself inundated with prizes as well as the illustrious Powdermill Trophy.

Michael is not just a nice fellow, but one of the very few true Club members, ready and willing to do whatever he can to support the Club. So, despite your reporter’s disappointment at yet another pathetic ‘Club’ performance, he was genuinely delighted to have the honour of presenting Michael with his trophy and prizes.

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Apart from the undisclosed amount of cash (handed over discretely in a sealed envelope, which he will not be declaring to Revenue & Customs), he also received one of the highly prized ‘sticks’ expertly made by master craftsman Sam Hills. Being a dear friend of Sam’s this is not Woody’s first stick, but you really cannot have too many of these masterpieces. Woody was equally thrilled with his beautiful pewter flask, complete with separate miniature funnel. The attractive silver trout tiepin rounded off his collection of prizes.

As you cannot win two prizes, one of our ‘new boys’ Derek Coles took the best from the bank. Being a new addition to the ‘family’ he is currently often referred to as “the tall white haired bloke” by the ‘old boys’ as it takes a number of years before names get attached to faces. Having caught two fish from the bank in the morning, he was leading the field at lunchtime but, like almost everyone else, he could not capitalise on this despite the many hours of boat experience he has notched up this season.

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The ‘Best from a Boat’ went to Dr Steven Stern. Steve nearly missed the prize giving as, once he had finished stuffing his face at the BBQ, he was planning to sneak home early. This was a sensible plan, as people were soon to find out that, in addition to another of his extraordinary cakes, he had also donated a vast quantity of various pickles and preserves for the raffle. His unusual concoctions are fast gaining a following (your intrepid reporter being his biggest fan) and the odd jar of pickle or preserve is highly prized among ‘foodies’. However, an entire box-full can seem a bit daunting, so he thought it best not to be around when the horrified winner was confronted with a whole year’s supply of eye-watering spicy pickles.

Dr Steven ‘Don’t ask me, I’m retired’ Stern was one of only four anglers who managed to land a fish from a boat and, much to his surprise, his just happened to be a couple of ounces heavier than his nearest rival.

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The usual thanks goes to Mandy & John, our caterers, who after eight years and sixteen Club BBQ’s are beginning to get the hang of it! Thanks to everyone else who contributed to making the day so enjoyable despite the lack of fish and the brief downpour.

I personally am particularly delighted to have found an assistant photographer willing and capable of taking photos of old people and making them appear half reasonable. Thanks Sue.

So who was the unfortunate winner of the pickles? John Keeling is no stranger to the Doctor’s concoctions as he won a vast quantity of his pickles in the raffle two years ago. So he knows exactly what to expect this time, as does his family if the gasps of despair emanating from their direction is anything to go by. At least it should keep them all ‘regular’!

All the photos from this year's event are now available. (No need to register to view on either site)

View in Dropbox.

View on our Facebook page.

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Those of you are old enough to remember the adult magazine ‘Rustler’ will be interested to read the latest anecdote from Bernie Meaden. This story can be found on Bernie’s own page "Meaden's Memories" at the bottom of the menu on the left.

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READY FOR ACTION

Friday sees the annual Club fishing competition with 18 entrants and the evening BBQ with around 50 to 60 ‘revellers’. The pop-up marquee was erected and the smaller one had its frame assembled, but just as the roof sheet was slid over the top the heavens opened. We were very fortunate to just manage to avoid being soaked. Once the sunshine returned the tenting was completed. Showers and sunshine continued to be the order of the day and there is a distinct possibility that we could be in for much of the same tomorrow. The forecasters are slightly more optimistic than your intrepid reporter, who will be taking a change of clothing just in case.

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Although your intrepid reporter will not be competing in the Club fishing competition, he still risks a soaking as his roving reporter’s role will see him desperately scrabbling around the reservoir in the forlorn hope that one of the ageing competitors foul hooks a fish. On the basis of their recent performances the competitors are unlikely to catch one by conventional methods but with so many fish crammed into the reservoir, foul hooking is a distinct possibility.

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OH NO, NOT MORE LEGS

Someone really needs to have a word with our ageing Club members about the advisability of exposing sensitive parts of the body at this or any other time of year. Fortunately our strict codes of practice and censorship will only permit the publication of the least offensive examples. So in the hope that others realise just how revolting the sight of their pasty white legs can be, we feel obliged to show a couple examples of arguably the least revolting, as modelled by retired banker Geoffrey Piltcher. How worse can they get - you would be surprised!

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Geoffrey 'Legs' Piltcher

The combination of yesterday’s fish delivery, slightly cooler temperatures, more cloud cover and calm water should result in excellent fishing. Yet there was no sign of the three boat anglers, who had been out all morning, catching any trout. All three were fishing near the aerator.

In the afternoon the bailiff was driving the mower up and down the dam and could see lots of fish rising, mostly in the calmer areas where there was no ripple. At around 3pm, on finishing ‘tidying up’ the grass on the dam in preparation for Friday’s Club competition, he was joined by your intrepid reporter, who had been bitten to distraction by the creatures under the trees around the woodshed. Both were ready for an excuse to stop for a coffee. However, while waiting for the kettle to boil, the bailiff decided to have a quick cast off the dam and the reporter decided to go along with his camera in the hope of getting some action shots of the bailiff.

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On arriving at the first staging, the bailiff immediately saw a fish surface and cast at it. As the fly hit the water he was instantaneously into a fish. The reporter was still strolling along the dam a short distance behind. There was indeed plenty of fish activity and when the bailiff decided to have a second cast it took only a matter of seconds before the fly on the dropper was taken by another rainbow. They could see another fish chasing the point fly as the fish was being played. At this point the pair decided that it was too easy and that the kettle would have boiled by now, so they departed. Two fish in two casts and nearly three in two casts. What flies was he using? It is irrelevant as the fish were clearly intent on feeding on whatever they came across and we believe that they would have taken anything within reason. Despite many experienced anglers insisting that in these conditions the fish must be deep, it was evident that the fish were willing to take flies off the surface, so why wouldn’t you prefer to use a dry fly on a floating line?

When your reporter departed at around 4.30pm the boats were still fishless, flogging away at what they thought was the only appropriate method in these conditions.

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YOUR RESIDENT CHIPPENDALE

No, not a member of the infamous dance troupe, but simply a poor imitation of the illustrious Thomas Chippendale. Yes, it’s your intrepid reporter wielding his electric saw (with its blade guard tied in the open position to make it easier to cut through wet timber). He could be seen scavenging through the piles of scrap timber searching for suitable bits, while stepping on the odd nail sticking out of rotting planks (three times). A Health & Safety officer’s nightmare staff member!

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Using yet more of Norman’s (Keighron Fencing Ltd) ‘waste’ timber, today’s project was a relatively straightforward requirement. The old wooden ramps which were used to enable the mower to be driven into its lockup container had rotted and completely disintegrated. So a new set was urgently required as the mower had been stranded in the open, subject to the vagaries of the elements. Having found more than enough timber, your over-enthusiastic woodworker ended up making three ramps. His reasoning is that when more suitable timber arrives, he will make another one to create a second pair. After all, you can never have too many wooden ramps!

Unfortunately, the next planned activity involves more unguarded’ electric saw blade action. ‘With the completion of the Kindling Store, all the scrap timber is now to be cut into manageable pieces which can then be chopped into kindling, hopefully by some enthusiastic volunteers. Fat chance!

In among the fish delivery on Tuesday we were pleased to receive an unexpected quantity of rainbows weighing 2½lbs. Hopefully, Jon Chapman will abandon his dodgy car wheeling and dealing and rush over for an evening’s fishing and try to catch something that will more than ‘fill the plate’ for a change.

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A DIFFERENT PARTRIDGE FAMILY

No, not the famous Partridge Family from the 1970’s TV sitcom, but the Bailiff’s youngest son, Greg, with his two boys watching the latest fish delivery on Tuesday. In his youth Greg was an accomplished fly fisher who spent many hours at the reservoir. Now residing in Hampshire with his wife and their two boys, he has little opportunity to come and fish his ‘home water’.

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A CAKE TOO FAR

Strolling back into the lodge mid-morning on Tuesday after a very wet weekend at Broadstairs Folk Festival, your intrepid reporter immediately sensed that something was wrong. The ‘old boys’ seemed decidedly nervous and became even more cagey when enquiries were made about the availability of cake. Eventually they were forced to come clean and admit that they had been stuffing their faces with a cake that they found in the fridge. Cake in the fridge? Yes, it is the safest place and the only one where we can guarantee that our resident pet mice cannot get at our food. They can become so desperate (the mice as well as the ‘old boys’) that, in order to get at the contents, they have been known to gnaw through cake tins (the mice, not the ‘old boys’). The ‘rats’ (previously referred to as the ‘old boys’) claimed to be innocents in a genuine misunderstanding.

It transpires that Steven Stern had finally managed to produce what he considered to be a perfect Victoria sponge. He had brought it in with strict instructions to the bailiff to pass it to the Club’s leading self-professed expert cake taster and Victoria sponge aficionado, in order to obtain an authoritative assessment. To avoid embarrassment we will not mention what happened to make the doctor’s previous Victoria sponge taste so “bizarre” (His word not ours - see 2nd August).

Also to avoid embarrassment, we will not mention the names of the ‘old boys’ who, without so much as a by-your-leave, could not resist scoffing the cake that they ‘discovered’.

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CLUB COMPETITION & BBQ

At this time of year we would normally warn prospective visitors that this coming Friday (15th August) we will be enjoying (not necessarily the most appropriate word) our annual Club competition during the day followed by a BBQ in the late afternoon/evening.

On the basis of the number of visitors that we currently welcome, I do not think that we need worry this year. Indeed, if you would like to come along and out-fish our Club members we will be delighted to publicise your efforts while criticizing the usual pathetic performance of this year’s 18 miserable contestants.

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The other day I challenged any of the ‘experts’, who occasionally visit Powdermill, to come and fish when it is not ‘easy’. Needless to say, I do not expect any of the Premier Division boys to take up the challenge, so we will probably have to make do with someone from a lower division.

As if perfectly on cue, I receive an e-mail from Jon Chapman, an occasional visitor to our reservoir. In the recent past he has complained at the size of our fish. We freely admit that in recent weeks one of our suppliers has been obliged to supply smaller 1½lb fish. However JC is building an unenviable reputation for only catching the smallest rainbows in the reservoir. His e-mail reads as follows:

So who on earth are the Hobbs Parker Team? The Hobbs Parker Group can trace their origins all the way back to 1850. They are based in Ashford but also have an office in Tenterden. Although I understand they are a reputable firm covering a wide range of activities including estate Agents, Car Auctions, Property Consultants and Auctioneers, such activities are always viewed with suspicion by members of the general public. And rightly so given that JC is their leading car auctioneer and his colleague and pal, Elwyn Davies, can be found auctioning livestock at Ashford Market.

For some inexplicable reason, Elwyn’s presence is not mentioned in Jon’s email, but I think Elwyn actually managed to catch one while Jon had three. A couple of Jon’s fish were 1½lb while the third was only a pathetic 1lb. How does he find them? In fairness, the bailiff confirms that the fish had clearly been in the reservoir for some time and had obviously lost weight but was sleek and fit. Oh, and poor Irish John and Tom apparently failed to land anything. So not the greatest team and will probably need a few more seasons before they are likely to gain promotion to the Premiership. However, with what purports to be a first Division player at its helm these boys could well go far. But probably not in my lifetime!

It is hardly acceptable for you reporter to be rude about visitors when our Club members, despite all their local knowledge, are proving to be equally inept if not more so. When was the last time that a Club member recorded a limit? How many of them have blanked recently?

The water is stuffed full of trout and yet more fish will be arriving next week. But goodness knows why as numbers are irrelevant. Conditions are the key. But it is possible to have a really enjoyable time and still fail to catch anything. So do not refuse to fish just because people blank, after all you may not! I am constantly amazed at the number of anglers who make the effort to come all the way to the water, only to look in the returns book and promptly depart. There is more to fly fishing than a guaranteed bag full. However, if that is your prime purpose I will let you into a little secret.

ASDA are currently offering the perfect standard plate-sized rainbow on their fresh fish counter. These little beauties, each weigh exactly 270g (just under 10ozs). They will happily fillet for you at no extra cost. However, at £3 each or two for £5 they are hardly cheap and I can assure you that obtaining them does not involve a great deal of fun or excitement, as apparently enjoyed by the Hobbs Parker Team. Also, at Powdermill you do tend to meet a better class of person than at ASDA, unless of course you bump into some dodgy auctioneers out for an evening’s fun and excitement.

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THE KINDLING STORE

As promised and bang on schedule, the final cosmetic touches were made, on Friday, to the palatial new annex attached to the log store. All that is now required is to turn the mountain of scrap timber into kindling.

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A TIMELY MODIFICATION

The increasingly hard ground proved to be a problem the other week when Alec Chisholm attempted to drive his wheelchair onto the new ramp. The result is a sloping extension to the ramp which is hinged to ensure that the whole structure is still east to carry.

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With another week of hot weather forecast, evenings are still the best time to come fishing (evenings in August start at 4pm). The other alternative is to start fishing at 6.30 am and pack up when it gets too hot at about 10.30 am. However, if you do decide to make an early start, try not to wake the bailiff by revving your motor, tooting your horn or banging on his door demanding advice as to where to fish. Just get on with it and he will eventually appear bleary eyed and irritable (he is never sociable until after the first mug of coffee). Some people say that he is just not sociable!

Apropos the continuing heatwave, I received an email today from ‘Salmon & Trout Sussex’ in which they forwarded an email from selectafly.com entitled “Beat the heat”.

Their advice is as follows:

I actually do own an ‘Ultra Fast Sink’ line but the majority of our Club Members don’t. So, if the advice from Selectafly is to be heeded, it’s down to a very long leader! However, if members follow this advice, many of them will invariably end up in a hell of a tangle, be constantly unhooking the fly from the back of the dam or off to A&E to have a fly extracted from one or other earlobe. Or worse still, their boat partner’s earlobe.

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In The Heat of the Day

A consistently high water temperature certainly is a serious problem but we know the fish are still feeding and not just skulking in the depths. How do we know this? Simply because we can see fish taking small creatures off the surface at some time during the day. However, persuading them to take your offering is not as easy as it should be. With more fish going in than are coming out it we cannot blame stocking levels for it being hard but at this time of year it never is that straightforward. What we could do with is some of the so-called ‘experts’ who deign to come and catch their limit during the Mayfly hatch to show us how to do it when conditions are not so easy. Maybe the likes of Andy Lush (proprietor of ‘The Friendly Fisherman’ in Tunbridge Wells) would like to ‘give it a go’. I can promise plenty of free publicity irrespective of success or failure!

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CLA GAME FAIR - A TRADER’S VIEW

Selectafly commented that “One thing is becoming clear both from discussion at the event itself and subsequently that it is becoming increasingly difficult for fishing tackle businesses to justify the cost of attending the Game Fair. If you have any thoughts on this and what you want from the event - be it discounts, new product launches, the opportunity to meet well known fishing faces, etc. etc. please do drop us a line - we'd love to hear your views.”

The costs of attending the Game Fair take some covering if your aim is to make a profit. Selectafly presumably wonder if it was worth it. It is not just the horrendous pitch cost but everything else associated with three days total expenses. If you are one of the big boys, like manufacturer ‘Hardy & Grey’ or luxury retailer ‘Farlow’s of Pall Mall’, your justification for being there is not just measured in show sales. However, we expressed our concern about this very topic in our assessment of the Fishing Village (Latest News: 26 July). As long as internet and mail order sellers continue to increase their share of the market, ‘traditional’ dealers will find it harder to bear the additional cost of attending these extravaganzas and still be expected to compete with the on-line discounters. What’s my solution? I don’t have one and, like the vast majority of you, will still check how cheaply I can get it on the Net and invariably buy it from there without any hesitation if the price is right. For those of you without internet access the larger internet retailers also bombard us with mail order magazines offering virtually everything at the same discounts, which no cost conscious angler seems to be able to refuse.

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BUILDING WORK

The long awaited Kindling Store is finally taking shape and should be completed this week. Despite the lack of suitable materials the shack is gradually evolving out of a pile of rubbish. All the timber, from various sources, was destined for land-fill but acquired for kindling.

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However, the best of the prospective kindling is finding a second useful ‘life’ but it is ten times as hard to cobble together rubbish as it would be to use some decent materials. Even the nails are being removed from the rotten timber and being reused. So we end up with a building which has not cost a single penny, but would be an eyesore and an embarrassment if not cleverly hidden behind the magnificent edifice that passes for the Log Store.

With so few anglers bothering to fish in the heat of the day and just as few prepared to tear themselves away from 'Coronation Street' or whatever takes their fancy on the box in the evening, there is very little to report. However, yesterday afternoon (Thursday), Steven Stern and his fishing partner rowed out for an evening's fishing when everyone else would have been thinking of going home. Although they caught trout, Steve was more excited by the shoal of Rudd.......

Your intrepid reporter does not know how to react to this news. He is almost excited enough to actually consider going fishing at the thought of lots of Rudd, but distraught at the thought of cake being thrown away.

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One of our RUDD caught by John Austin

The Powdermill rudd are superb and you will not find more beautiful rudd anywhere else in the country and with NO roach in our water they are not hybrids but the real thing!!!!! However, over the years, food has arguably been more important than fishing, so the news that the good doctor has discarded what may well have been a reasonably edible (if not perfect) cake is the ultimate sin and almost too upsetting to bear. So next week cannot come quickly enough.

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ADDING INSULT TO INJURY

On Wednesday Don Burt rowed in, to meet one of hi daughters for lunch, bemoaning the fact that Terry Beeching, an incompetent and generally useless angler had managed to catch two rainbows that morning while he, a very experienced and highly skilled angler had not had a touch (both were primarily using a Daiwl Bach). Your intrepid reporter has to agree that it is difficult to comprehend how ‘The Cuckoo’ managed to persuade two trout to look at his fly let alone end up in his boat.

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Don Burt / Terry Beaching

However, your intrepid reporter is not afraid (which is why he is ‘intrepid’) to state that, like most HFF Club members, Don has proved to be equally, if not even more, useless and incompetent. Sadly, this is why many visitors who are not familiar with our water consistently out-fish members. And to make matters worse your reporter often feels more like he is looking after the inmates of a care home rather than enjoying the company of a group of experienced fly fishermen. What a pathetic bunch.

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HOPE AHEAD?

The weather forecasters are now suggesting that cooler weather could be on its way, with the odd shower. If this is the case, then fishing during the day should be more comfortable and hopefully more productive. The evenings are likely to continue to be good and certainly more fun than ‘Coronation Street’. Sadly, it’s never been the same since Reg Holdsworth and Curly Watts left.

What an incredibly quiet start to the week with not a single angler fishing during the day on Monday. However one visitor and two Club members heeded our advice and did come fishing in the late afternoon and into the early evening, but the bailiff informs me that they all went home early and the fish only appeared, to sip the little black midges off the surface, after all three had left. So if you are going to fish in the evening, please stay until the sun has well and truly set and you have to grope your way back to the lodge. I suspect that our resident male Grebe tips them off when it’s ‘All Clear’.

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Tuesday could well have turned out to be exactly the same but two idiots insisted on setting sail early this morning. The latter statement is not strictly true as ‘The Wood Butcher’ had no option, having been ‘press ganged’ by ‘Captain’ Chisholm. The ‘Captain’ proceeded to motor the wheelie boat aimlessly around the reservoir before eventually settling on the ‘bubbles’. By noon the handful of observers, including your intrepid reporter, had got bored and left with still no sign of a bag over the side. Hopefully someone will arrive this evening capable of catching something.

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NOT FOR THE SQUEAMISH

Unfortunately while idly chatting outside the lodge on Tuesday morning, your intrepid reporter was savagely attacked by what he suspects was a 'Snipe fly'. This nasty creature is a close relative of the Horse Fly. Subsequent research suggests that this Snipe Fly was either Rhagio scolopacea or Chrysopilus cristatus both of which have dark marks and shading on the wings and are not easy to tell apart. The adult flies are usually found between May and August, flying close to woodland or hedgerows. Quick as a flash, your intrepid reporter swatted the offending creature, but not before it had done its worst.

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The 'Snipe Fly' - Possibly Either a Rhagio scolopacea or Chrysopilus cristatus

‘Uncle’ Ted Stevenson, who is our self-professed leading entomologist, warned the slightly alarmed reporter that it may not necessarily have been sucking blood but could have been laying its eggs under the skin. The flesh eating larvae would subsequently eat their way out. He also stressed that a bite could cause a serious rapid allergic reaction resulting in an agonising death if not dealt with immediately.

The ‘old boys’ were able to examine the fly at close quarters and the reporter took photos in case it needed to be accurately identified, if it became necessary to administer the appropriate serum. Some visitors and many Club members will be disappointed to learn that despite the pain, your intrepid reporter is still very much alive.

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Editor’s Note:
Lest readers become alarmed and avoid coming to the reservoir - oh, you are already avoiding coming - please be reassured that we do not have any flies which lay eggs in humans. However, there is no guarantee that a bite by any one of the dangerous creatures lurking around the reservoir would not result in an allergic reaction and an agonising death, but we are fairly certain that should you wish to insure yourself against such an eventuality the premium would be surprisingly low. We can also assure you that since the Club was formed in 1935 no member or visitor has actually died at the reservoir. Or have they? Could this be another HFF cover-up for the conspiracy theorists!

Despite the continued heatwave, the odd angler still insists on risking sunstroke by fishing during the heat of the day. I am getting fed up of suggesting that you fish in the evening as the later you stay the better. Dr Stern recently wrote in the returns book that “during the last hour the reservoir came alive with fish everywhere” and he managed to catch three during the mayhem.

Now, I hope that this annotation does not set a precedent as the returns ledger is not intended as a ‘remarks book’. Maybe we should have a ‘Comments book’ of even a suggestion box. Your editorial team would be pleased to administer such a facility as we could then use these pages to reply to any comments and criticisms and tell you all what we really think. As usual it is likely to be rude and offensive which is what we pretend is just jolly banter.

No sooner had I written the above than I received an email from Martin Brignall reinforcing my advice - together with a photo of the gorgeous sunset.

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SUE, PLEASE DO NOT BUY ANYTHING ELSE

Somehow Sue Goodhand (nee Partridge) remains undeterred by the theft of her revolting mermaid (as reported on 30th June) and has now ‘donated’ (some would say “dumped” or “off-loaded”) another of her jumble sale finds.

On this occasion it is a ‘Golf’ Clock purchased for the princely sum of £1. Despite most golf related items being very collectable we suspect that the jumble sale organisers could not believe their luck at finding a mug willing to pay good money for this particular monstrosity.

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Sue & the Naff Golf Clock

Not being noted for his good taste, the Bailiff has suggested that he might take it home, presumably because his is obsessed with golf. If he thinks better of it, I suggest that we install it in the toilet in the hope that whoever stole the mermaid from that room also takes a fancy to the equally naff clock.

We do not wish to appear ungrateful and genuinely appreciate any little kindness but there is a limit to what we can be expected to be thankful for. For the second time in succession, Sue has stretched our gratitude beyond reasonable limits. What will we suffer next?

As Bibury Trout Farm was not far from where we were staying Barry ‘The Fishmonger’ Morgan and your intrepid reporter with his long-suffering wife in tow took the opportunity to visit and learn a bit about their operation. Bibury is a beautiful village on the edge of the Cotswolds which is host to thousands of tourists.

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Kate Marriott showed us around the 15 acre Fish Farm which is bang in the centre of the village and has 40,000 paying visitors each year. The size and number of ponds means that they can hold large numbers of fish. They produce their own eggs and even supply them to other fish farms. We were very impressed with everything including the knowledgeable staff that we met while wandering around the farm. A real treat and a very interesting, enjoyable and informative visit!

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CLA GAME FAIR

THE FISHING VILLAGE
I left the Fishing Village until my second day of our visit. Being impressed with virtually everything we had seen on the opening day and given all the hype about the re-vamped fishing, I was expecting great things. It therefore came as a bit of a disappointment, as my initial foray revealed nothing which got me really excited. I dread to think what it was like previously.

A couple of disillusioned regulars assured me that there appeared to be fewer stands and even fewer genuine bargains to be had. The latter is highly surprising when internet selling and mail order is so fiercely competitive, leaving no room for any further genuine Show discounts. Plenty of rods on show, but the bigger discounts were mainly on last year’s models which were no cheaper than currently on offer on the Net. New exciting products were few and far between. Maybe I was expecting too much but......

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Steve Munn

Fortunately, the demonstrations by the professional fly fishermen were generally very interesting and enjoyable. I particularly enjoyed the demonstration by the very personable Stevie Munn of the elite Hardy Greys Pro Team and Partridge Hooks Pro Team. He hails from Co. Antrim in N.Ireland, and it was particularly pleasing to see his genuine enthusiasm when talking about the large Irish Lough run wild brown trout (called the Dollaghan) in his homeland.


ANGLING TRUST’S FISHERIES MANAGEMENT ADVISOR
Fortunately, the demonstrations were not the only productive time spent at the fishing as I was able to meet and have a long discussion with Colin Barker, one of only three Angling Trust Fisheries Management Advisors, regarding our cormorant problem. Although the three FMAs are employed by the Angling Trust the funding for them comes directly from anglers’ Rod Licence funds which are administered by the Environment Agency. So at long last we at Powdermill may get something for our ‘fishing tax’. Three advisors to cover the entire country is really spreading it thin and poor Colin has to cover the area of the country roughly on a line to the east of the M1.

Despite being very busy, Colin has already been in contact since the Show, providing available dates in his busy diary, and I am looking forward to him visiting us in the near future.


THE WILD TROUT TRUST
Another potentially useful organisation that I discovered at the Show is The Wild Trout Trust. Not having heard of them before, I was not sure what they do. Although my initial impression was that they were mainly preoccupied with rivers, I was pleased to find that they were genuinely interested in our concern at the rapid decline in our population of ‘native’ Brown Trout in the reservoir.

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Wild Trout Trust

Although cormorant predation could well be a significant factor in their decline, the silting-up of their spawning grounds in the feeder streams must, in my view, also be an equally pressing problem. Hopefully, they can provide us with some help or advice and I look forward to making further contact.


BOATS FROM HEYLAND
At long last, I have found a viable British alternative to the French manufactured Aqua-Pêche (our green coloured boats). Although our three Aqua-Pêche boats are very popular with anglers and have required little maintenance so far, they are quite expensive to buy.

Heyland Marine were not situated in the Fishing Village but were in the main drag heading towards the shopping area. I was literally stopped in my tracks when I saw the ‘Sturdy Rowing 320’. I then nearly fainted when I saw the price – half the current cost of the Aqua-Pêche! I visited this exhibitor three times and crawled all over this boat, took loads of photos from every angle and interrogated the staff. Despite the very competitive price the ‘Sturdy’ range is well named and appears to be much more robust than its French rival. And it’s just one of a number of potentially useful boats that Heyland Marine offer which would be suitable for use on our reservoir. However, the ‘320’ would be my choice and has even got roller wheels on the back to make it easier for our ageing Bailiff to drag it ashore.

Another exciting discovery (sometimes it doesn’t take much to excite your intrepid reporter) is the availability of suitable aluminium oars, which we have struggled to obtain in the past. However, they also proudly showed me their beautiful wooden oars which are almost works of art and therefore far too good for the likes of our members and visitors. I had to refrain from asking the price of spare aluminium oars as, given the cost of their boats, I feared that the response would have me franticly reaching for my cheque book!


A COUPLE OF ‘LOCALS’ AT THE FAIR
While having a restorative coffee in the Fishing Village, I thought that I recognised a chap on the next table. It turns out that he had fished Powdermill once this year and that was his first time at our water. I can only assume that it was his dashing good looks which had made such an impression that once seen never forgotten. Dave Honeywood who lives in Lewes had brought along his pal Kevin MacDonald who comes from Herstmonceux. Kevin was new to fly fishing and was in the market for his first fly rod. He ended up with a Greys GR30 rod together with a free reel.

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Kevin MacDonald & Dave Honeywood

Although Kevin is not far away from Powdermill, Brick Farm is only down the road from Herstmonceux. It is a reasonable place for a beginner to practice casting and somewhere where you normally can easily catch fish. However, at this time of year it is closed due to the water temperature. I hope that both of them will come to fish with us in the near future. Although it’s a long way for Dave to come for an evening’s fishing, he should be assured of some good sport given the recent reports. Although it is difficult during these hot days, anglers are reporting that the fish suddenly appear everywhere as the evening progresses.


SMOKERS
Being a Game Fair it was hardly surprising that there were some serious smokers on show in the Shopping Village. The most impressive smokers designed to permanently live in the garden cost around £1,000, complete with a free cover! These beautifully made ovens can be used to hot and cold smoke.

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Quality Smoker / Another Quality Smoker / An Awful Smoker

So imagine my surprise (and horror) at coming across a smoker based on a four-drawer filing cabinet!!!! Having been externally painted in black it looked tidy. That was until I decided to open one of the drawers. The inside was as grubby as the one initially used by Alec Chisholm before it was dumped in the woods in order to ensure that we did not all die of food poisoning. How anyone can display such an abomination in front of their stall for all to examine beggars belief. Especially as they offer lessons in smoking meat or fish. If you are tempted to go to them (I dare not mention their name lest they sue me) I suggest that you give them a miss as we can show you how to prepare and smoke fish in an unhygienic manner if that’s what you want - and all free of charge. After all, everything about the ‘old boys’ at Powdermill is pretty unsavoury and unhygienic.

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A RAMP FOR THE WHEELIE BOAT

A week away from the reservoir yet nothing has changed on my return. Had time stood still? Not quite. Mowing and strimming has continued (the Bailiff’s favourite occupation). Some say “virtually his only occupation” or at least the only one he enjoys – especially when sitting on the mower. However, Mick ‘The Wood Butcher’ Wood has taken on the role of Green Keeper and is gradually hand mowing and improving the Putting Green. Yes, I did say Putting Green!

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However, the most pleasing development in my absence was the delivery of a wooden ramp to enable Alec Chisholm to drive his scooter onto the wheelie boat, The ramp should ensure that he avoids getting bogged down in the mud, when the water level goes down. On hearing of Alec’s predicament, the ramp was built and provided, free of charge by Norman Keighron. We have mentioned Norman’s Fencing business before but he really is good and we can highly recommend him.

Keighron Fencing - www.keighronfencing.co.uk

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COOL DUDE DELIVERS

The latest fish delivery arrived in the midday heat wave on Thursday. Despite the difference in temperature between the tanks and the warm reservoir, the fish did not seem to mind and happily swam away. Ignoring the blazing sunshine, Christian donned his waders and sweated his way up and down the dam. However, he kept his sunglasses on to ensure that he looked cool even if he wasn’t!

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Christian looking cool in his shades

On Tuesday, still flushed after his narrow victory last Sunday over his regular fishing partner, John Austin decided to make hay while the sun shines (and it really was shining and over 25°C). He forced his long suffering son to accompany him, in order to demonstrate his angling prowess while his luck was still ‘in’. Despite the intense brightness he managed to land three fish by lunchtime while his son also caught a couple. At this point they decided to call it a day before the blazing sun fried them to a crisp.

You would not necessarily expect to catch much in these conditions but even fellow Club member, Don Burt, fishing in the same general area had also caught three by lunchtime. Unlike the Austins, Don did not have the good sense to call it a day and carried on bobbing about in the middle of the reservoir, ignoring the risk of sunstroke. Hopefully, his efforts will have been further rewarded.

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The Austins

The only other anglers to venture out in the morning were Mick ‘The Wood Butcher’ Wood and Alec Chisholm. The pair set off in the wheelie boat at around 10am but returned at around 2pm - fishless!! After a refreshing cup of coffee, the pair discussed the advisability of going out again for a couple more hours. Your reporter pleaded with them not to bother, as having witnessed their ‘Laurel & Hardy’ style antics he could see that they were wasting their time and were only succeeding in ruining our returns for the day. It is surprising how many prospective visitors come all the way to the reservoir and then refuse to fish if they see too many “Nil’s” in the book.

In my humble opinion if you want a guaranteed bag limit and need evidence that everyone else is hauling them out, then you should come in March and April when even Mick ‘The Wood Butcher’ Wood and Alec Chisholm are almost certain to be able to enter a limit bag in the returns book. However, at this time of year when things are not as easy in the heat of the day, I suggest that you consider coming for an evening (from 4pm until dark - £20 for four fish).

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Woody & Alec

Alternatively, you could beat a path to Hawkhurst Fish Farm (not far from us) where I can positively guarantee that you will catch loads of fish. It only costs an adult a tenner for an entire day or for us OAP’s it’s only £6. This entitles you to fish the “Family Lakes” where you will catch loads and loads of carp. Oh! And don’t bother to take your fly rod, but if you need to hire equipment and buy bait, they will be only too happy to oblige. On a serious note, if you have children or grand children of a reasonable age you will be hard pushed to find a better introduction to fishing and I look forward to taking mine in due course.

But if you really want to enjoy a bit of FLY fishing, in a well stocked reservoir which has stunning scenery then it would be difficult to find a better venue than Powdermill. The fish are there in good numbers but there really are no guarantees so the rest is up to you.

The cooler weather, slight breeze and only the odd shower resulted in a pretty good weekend for fly fishing and, for a change, the trout decided to play fair. Fish could be found all over the reservoir and I was pleased to see that most anglers caught fish. Floating lines are still favourite but some anglers are using intermediate lines and the odd angler has even claimed that they have found the fish in the depths on sinking line. Take your pick of what fly to use. The returns book provides a good indication of what has previously been successful but using what you feel confident with can often prove equally as successful. Lack of belief in what you are using often guarantees failure.

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AUSTIN REVIVES HIS FORTUNES - BUT ONLY JUST!

The grudge match which took place on Saturday between John Austin and Keith Blundell should have ended in a tie, but Blundell claims that he let Austin just sneak a 6 - 5 fish win. Keith insists that he had plenty of opportunities to catch his six fish limit but did not want to upset his boat partner, who can become bad tempered and irritable when regularly being soundly beaten. Keith is such a nice and accommodating chap that he could not bear to see John upset yet again so held back on the last fish. What a gentlemanly sport!

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KNOBBLY KNEES

The only time that your intrepid reporter exposes his knobbly knees in public is on the rare occasions when he can be found around the pool on holiday. Even my loving wife does not rate my legs as being one of my best features.

So one has to ask the question why no one has told all the old and decrepit Club members how revolting they look in their shorts. The slightest suggestion of sunshine and out they all come, in a variety of baggy shorts displaying a wide selection of revolting legs. While they may have looked dashing, and many years ago some could even have looked slightly appealing to the female population, time and age have taken their toll and some things are best left covered. Indeed, some things should not even be left to the imagination.

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In an effort to protect you from the worst excesses, we have often had to crop photos to avoid subjecting readers to any more suffering than is absolutely necessary. So the next time that you see a photo on our website of a legless angler you ill appreciate why!

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A BROWNIE

In an effort to go all ‘arty’, the latest photo of Dr Steven Stern with a 3lb brown trout has been turned into an artistic monstrosity by your editorial team. With other fishing websites trying to go all trendy and stylish in order to appear chic and cool, we too wish to appeal to the trendy, stylish, chic and cool members of the angling fraternity. Sadly we have consistently failed and have to make do with people like you. When we stop and examine our latest effort to turn angling into a cultural experience we can see why.

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This is the Arty Photo / This is the Normal Photo

Although the delivery of fish (last Tuesday) boosted stocks, half the fish caught this week have clearly been from previous stockings. Due to supplier problems, our recent supplies have contained smaller fish than we would normally receive, but we are hoping that this will be rectified in our next shipment. The unsettled weather is restricting any further rise in water temperature which is a relief as it’s currently peaking at 20°C.

For those prepared to risk a soaking, the fishing has been reasonably good. Despite the unfavourable conditions fish have been particularly active during the evenings and can be seen rising in good numbers. Fishing the ‘bubbles’ from a boat is increasingly popular and, as a result, boat anglers are missing out on fish which appear in other locations. We could often see fish rising in the main body of the reservoir yet, despite this, the boat fishermen refused to leave the turbulent water along the air line. Anglers are currently using a wide variety of flies although the bailiff continues to consistently catch on dry fly only.

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EASTBOURNE FLY DRESSERS

At last the photos arrive of the competition between Hastings Fly Fishers and Eastbourne Fly Dressers. Thanks to Keith Blundell for trusting Susan Brignall with his new camera. A good effort by Keith and Sue. After hours of cropping, enhancing and generally sorting out we are pleased to publish the best of the sorry collection.

Thanks to those Club members who blanked, Eastbourne Fly Dressers were the overall winners. However, all we propose to say is that a total of 33 fish were caught but Eastbourne caught more than Hastings. After a number of pleas from members fearing even more ridicule when others find out how pathetic they were, we have agreed to say no more about it. Hopefully we will field a half decent team next year. Fortunately, Eastbourne Fly Dressers were unable to take the Cup away as Tim Stacey had brought along the wrong trophy.

Sometimes I despair!!

All the photos from this years event are now available.
(No need to register to view on either site)

View in Dropbox.

View on our Facebook page.

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JOHN AUSTIN FAILS AGAIN

For the second time running this month, John Austin has been out-fished by his regular fishing partner, Keith Blundell. Keith caught more fish than John during the competition with Eastbourne Fly Dressers. For many years Keith has fished in the shadow of the self professed angling master. How the mighty have fallen. They are due out together again, in a boat, today (12th July) and we are somewhat concerned that if Keith goes for the hat-trick he may find himself over the side!

For those of you still interested in coming fishing you will be pleased to note that another delivery will be arriving at midday today (Tuesday 8 July), but unfortunately on this occasion your ever-present reporter will be elsewhere. I would not wish to deny you the pleasure of seeing the same old image of someone netting fish out of a tank or unceremoniously dumping them in the reservoir, so please make do with this photo.

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Sue Brignall / Hooke Springs Delivery

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PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE

On the subject of photos, I am patiently awaiting the arrival of photos of the competition between Hastings Flyfishers and Eastbourne Fly Dressers which took place last Saturday. Apparently Susan Brignall took some photos of the event with Keith Blundell's new Canon Camera. If Sue had kept possession of the photos I would have received them by now, but as they they are with Keith we will all have to be patient. Very patient! However, eventually he will find some convoluted means of getting them to your editorial team.

In the meantime, let me congratulate the participants on actually managing to catch some fish this year. A total of thirty-two fish were landed with lots more apparently lost. However, a number of the Hastings team failed to landed anything, which was a major contributory factor to Eastbourne's victory this year. Yes, Eastbourne won, Hastings lost!!! Your editorial team were so 'gobsmacked' that they are refusing to print the details until photos of the debacle are available in order to be able to name and shame the pathetic individuals responsible for our ignominious defeat. So, in the meantime make do with a photo of our latest stand-in paparazzo.

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DAVE’S LATEST ADVENTURE

Club member, Dave Nicholls, thinks that he is still a young adventurer, but is in fact just as old and decrepit as the rest of us. Unfortunately, he is also prone to doing the sort of thing that people half his age think twice before attempting. So the email (received at 7pm on Monday 7th July) detailing his latest escapade comes as no surprise to those who know him. We are therefore delighted to be able to publish an ‘on the spot’ account of his latest solo adventure on his bike (on this occasion his wife had the good sense not to accompany him), so that others can live his experiences from the safety and security of their armchairs.

Easy Rider eat your heart out!

We can only hope that Dave eventually gets back safely, but in the meantime we look forward to his next email continuing the account of his latest adventure.

I am constantly amazed at our hanging baskets. Despite there being only one plant per container, the lack of soil in each container and the lack of water (we are still metered despite the proximity of millions of gallons) the plants flourish and produce masses of flowers. This year, Chris Richards appeared with these plants which were surplus to his requirements. What a mistake! From now on, we will expect him to provide plants of the same quality each spring.

Having mentioned CJR (who likes to keep a low profile), I should mention that he actually fished one evening last week, but failed to hook a single fish despite their attempts to take his dry fly. So it was left to the bailiff to abandon his strimming of the grass along the dam, go and get his rod and show him how to actually catch a couple.

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We had the second visit this year from a keen observer of dragonflies. Armed with his butterfly net and camera with monster lens (requiring a monopod) he skulked around looking for his prey. He offered to show me some of his photos but I politely refused, insisting that he send some of his photos, with a few words of explanation, for us all to enjoy. So far nothing! So, heaven help him when he turns up next time wanting to wander around if nothing is forthcoming. So the best that we can do is show you these butterflies. I have no idea what these dark coloured butterflies are called (could they be Doris and Walter?), but there are lots of them around the reservoir at present.

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We were a little worried about our ‘Birder’ who has not been seen around for some time, but the Bailiff was relieved to report that he appeared at the crack of dawn one morning last week. Despite the early hour, he had his observations ruined by a “lady” with at least six dogs who were rampaging through the woods and charging into the reservoir. Apart from trespassing, having dogs out of control and frightening every living thing, she has very colourful language when politely confronted. Sadly, most dog walkers who trespass around the reservoir are equally abusive if approached. Please explain to any of your friends who may walk in the Woodland Trust land, that Southern Water still own 100 metres around the reservoir and that public access is not permitted.

A report of the competition, last Saturday, between Hastings Flyfishers and Eastbourne Fly Dressers will be published shortly. I am told that fish were being caught immediately, so look forward to arriving at the reservoir on Monday morning to get all the ‘news’.

We also have exciting investigations taking place along the dam which will also be the subject of regular updates during the next week. So make sure that you regularly check our Latest News.

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THOUGHT FOR THE DAY, OR MAYBE FOR LIFE?

Two minutes out of your busy life is all that is required. When did you last stop for a moment and take the time to just "stand and stare". Well just pause for a moment and read Phil's latest 'thought' entitled MAYFLIES. There is more to it than first meets the eye. So take that two minute break and go to VIEWS FROM THE STREET.

When Tim Stacey came fishing last week, he had with him a new bass bag made of rubber. The bass bag, together with a range of landing nets using this new rubber mesh, is made by Snowbee.

The fine, hexagonal mesh has a rubber coating, which prevents it from absorbing water, so not only does it prevent the net from smelling of fish, but it completely dries, with just one shake. The rubber coating also prevents hook barbs catching in the mesh, which can be so annoying when you net a fish. For those of you who catch & release but cannot unhook the fish without netting it, this mesh is particularly kind.

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In my humble opinion this is a major step forward in net technology. Who among us has not put his net into his car on a hot day and found every cat in the neighbourhood looking for the dead fish.

If I ever bother to go fishing, I will be investing in a new lading net and a bass bag. Fortunately Snowbee make replacement nets in this material which will fit most existing landing nets. I note that other manufacturers are beginning to use this material and, for those of you who insist on the best, Hardy have an excellent ‘catch & release’ net which uses this rubberised mesh.

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GOOD WITH WOOD

Editor’s Note:
I have seen photos of a number of Richard Tomlinson’s buildings and they are amazing and in time to come will find themselves among tomorrows listed buildings.

Thomlinson's Timber-Framed Buildings - www.thomlinsonsoakframedbuildings.co.uk

However, not everyone can afford Richard’s masterpieces. So for those of you with limited means, together with low aspirations and standards, let me put myself forward as the potential antithesis of perfection.

The latest ‘Powdermill’ project is the construction of a kindling store. It is being made of old fencing and other scavenged bits, at a total cost of nothing! This potential eyesore is to be attached to the rear of the log store, so well out of sight. The photo below does not show just how bad the partly assembled roof is. It’s based on a very rotten wooden garage door frame which has been strengthened on the underside (ceiling) with shiplap from old fence panels. The other side (roof) will be lined with some flimsy rusty tin sheeting which was lying in the bailiff’s garden. The rest of the building is yet to be scavenged!!!!!

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Let me assure you that it is not easy to make things out of rubbish and I have to thank Keighron Fencing for providing us with scrap fencing. Norman Keighron kindly ‘dumps’ some of his unwanted rubbish on the pretext of generously providing us with timber that we can chop up for kindling for our log burner. Norman, having very high standards, will be horrified to discover that your intrepid reporter is actually using his rubbish to build things!

On a serious note, all my neighbours garden fencing so far has been installed by Norman Keighron and I could not be more impressed. So if you are looking for a good, reliable and friendly local contractor, look no further.

Keighron Fencing - www.keighronfencing.co.uk